An interview with Naomi Vladeck, a Certified Creativity Coach for artists and creators, and author of Braving Creativity: Artists Who Turn the Scary, Thrilling, Messy Path of Change into Courageous Transformation.
Naomi Vladeck is a certified life coach devoted to advancing the work of independent artists and creatives through her company, Creativity Matters Coaching. Naomi is skilled at cultivating authentic connections, championing individual creativity, and navigating life's changes and transitions to help her clients make choices that empower them to live a fully expressed creative life.
Born into a family where her father was a physician and her mother and siblings were artists, Naomi unveils how this blend guided her career trajectory and influenced her understanding of money. She shares how fear can be a roadblock to embracing change, and takes us through her courageous financial decisions during the pandemic that taught her the true definition of success.
Naomi talks about the importance of community, wrestling with imposter syndrome, and continuing on the path of self-discovery.
"When we face the blankness ahead of us, we have an opportunity because we enter into a transitional period where our creativity is available to us in a different way because nothing is known. Nothing is for sure. Nothing is certain. So it's not that you have to be an artist to be creative during change and transition. It's that the inherent space that opens up has a function and that function is creative." - Naomi Vladek
Key takeaways:
- You can rewrite your story. Naomi grew up accepting the narrative that, from among her siblings, she was NOT the risk taker, and that she was anxious around money and numbers. She questioned that story and recognized that she has made unconventional choices in her life, including studying Japanese theater, and that she has gone on to become a fundraiser for a career and managed many budgets and spreadsheets over her lifetime.
- Recognize that change is inherently creative. Naomi didn’t intentionally seek out change in her life. She did not think of herself as someone who could tolerate confusion and uncertainty. And yet, as she reflects on her life’s journey, she recognizes that she absolutely values the meandering or zigzagging path of creative living, and that she has been braver than she would have anticipated. The zigzagging path, as she puts it, is where we can choose to become the agents in our own life. We. It's not just that things happen to us. It's not just that change happens from the outside, but that we have the power to be the creators of our own life.
- Find your community. Naomi shared her experience of attending a performing arts camp when she was 16 years old and finding her people, where the sorts of people who didn’t fit in elsewhere fit in. Finding a community is important to help us find a safe space, to test old assumptions and beliefs we have that may make us feel vulnerable.
- Know that the creative process relies on failure. Culturally, we are taught to abhor failure. We think that failure is a dead end or bankruptcy, and can make us feel worthless. But the truth is just the opposite: the creative process relies on failure; innovation relies on failure.
About the guest:
Naomi Vladeck is a certified life coach devoted to advancing the work of independent artists and creatives through her company Creativity Matters Coaching. Naomi has been working with and around independent artists for thirty years as a performer, planner, as a non-profit founder and coach.
The experience of her husband’s alcoholism and death led to her writing debut: Braving Creativity, Artists Who Turn the Scary, Messy, Thrilling Path of Change into Courageous Transformation.
Naomi is available for workshops, podcasts, speaking events.
Website: www.creativitymatterscoaching.com
Email address: naomivladeck@gmail.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/creativitymatterscoaching/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/naomi.vladeck
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/naomi-vladeck/
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Naomi Vladeck
When we face the blankness ahead of us, we have an opportunity because we enter intotransitional period where our creativity is available to us in a different way because nothing is known. Nothing is for sure. Nothing is certain. So it's not that you have to be an artist to be creative during change and transition.
It's that the inherent space that opens up has a function and that function is creative.
Narrator
Welcome to making change with your money, a podcast that highlights the stories and strategies of women who experienced a big life transition and overcame challenges as they redefined financial success for themselves.
Now here's your host. Certified financial planner, Laura Rotter.
Laura Rotter
I'm so excited to have as my guest today, Naomi Vladeck. Naomi is a certified life coach devoted to advancing the work of independent artists and creatives through her company Creativity Matters Coaching. Naomi has been working with and around independent artists for 30 years as a performer, planner, A nonprofit founder and coach.
The experience of her husband's alcoholism and death led to her writing debut, braving creativity, artists who turned the scary, messy, thrilling path of change into courageous transformation. So welcome Naomi to the making change with your money podcast.
Naomi Vladeck
Thank you for having me. Looking forward to this conversation.
Laura Rotter
I'm going to start with the question I always start with, which is what was money like in your family growing up?
Naomi Vladeck
Yeah, I love that question. I was thinking about that today and since we've spoken, money was always.Accessible, you know, it was my father was a surgeon. So even though when they were young, they borrowed money from their parents to buy their first house and this kind of thing.
I never felt that I really wanted for anything. We had a corner house in a suburban neighborhood. And we went to private high school when we were juniors, and we went to private colleges, we weren't excessive in that we had fancy cars or things like that, but we were certainly, you know, comfortable and did all the things that suburban kids in the 80s, you know, are storied.
For doing so I, I didn't really want for anything. Yeah. And when you say we, you havesisters. Well, this is, this will come up later. I have a twin brother, so I, I'm inclined to, to we, my life, my life is weed. I'm such a collaborator and hand holder. So yeah, I have two brothers. I have a twin brother and a younger brother and they're both.
incredibly creative. One is a musician, a career musician, and one was a mountain guide and is also a coach today. Yeah.
Laura Rotter
Oh, that's wonderful. What kind of musician?
Naomi Vladeck
He is a American folk singer, songwriter, and he has been playing really large scale children's music and music venues for his money in his life to earn his a very lucrative career.
And he has also has his own band and writes separately. But yeah, yeah, he is hop along Andrew for anyone listening with young kids available for big events, parties, etc. He rides around, he rides around in Brooklyn with on a motorized bike with a a cab in the back, and he's dressed as a cowboy a lot of the time.
So he's a, he's an urban cowboy. I'm very proud of my brother. Yeah.
Laura Rotter
So it's interesting that, you know, your father's a doctor and his children are quite creative, doesn't it? Yes. He's not creative. He just chose a different path.
Naomi Vladeck
Yeah. And my mom is an artist. And so a lot of, Probably our permission to do things that were off path probably came from that, but also I think just a dynamic in the family system that we were sort of encouraged to make our own choices.
My father never implanted in us to follow his path. He didn't take us into the operatingcathedral. We didn't he didn't really nurture us in that way and. Yeah. So I think, um, to our family has some real Bundish Jewish roots and very intellectual history and musicians and artists in the family as well.
So I think that really was a big influence, especially on my, my twin brother. I know. Yeah.
Laura Rotter
So how did that start to play out in you, Naomi?
Naomi Vladeck
Yes. Yeah. So it's interesting. I grew up with a story that I was kind of a fearful kid. I didn't really like any big change to be thrust upon me. I was afraid of sleepovers.
I wasn't inclined to take risks in general. And at least that was a story I had about myself. Even at my wedding, I remember my dad saying that I was a child who was very afraid of new ventures. And I remember even then thinking, Oh, that's That's so interesting. Is that really true? Because at that point I had done some really eccentric things, you know, things that were not a conventional choice.
I studied Japanese theater for one, one example, definitely think that early on there was some kind of anxiety that was communicated to me related to risk around money, because I was anxious about. Numbers, even though I was good with numbers, but I didn't really allow myself to own that. I was good with numbers.
I, I carried that along with this other story. I was thinking earlier. I may have told you this funny thing about I was in college and I was working a summer and I went to interview at a retail store. And there was an antique cash register there and it was massive. It was massive. It was like the size of my desk.
It was beautiful. I appreciated that. But they actually use this cash register to, to, you know, to make transactions. And she's talking to me about his cash register. And all of a sudden the floor just. Tilted underneath me and I fainted and I've never fainted before in my life and I've never fainted since in my life and they were really sweet.
They, you know, asked me if I had my period, was that, you know, anything going on that it was causing? And I knew, I just knew it had to do with the, the immediate anxiety around having to interpret or digest or metabolize what they were going to tell me quickly. It was just something that. I had eventually been able to rewrite for myself and say, well, I know I don't do math under pressure, but I do math just fine.
Thank you very much. I went on to become a fundraiser for a career and have managed many budgets and spreadsheets over my lifetime. But I definitely think that there was this, this narrative because my parents had a very conventional. Marriage andI experienced in some ways that repetition in my original marriage, my marriage, my only marriage, my original marriage, my only marriage to my husband, where he, he dealt with the finances and I dealt with the children, that kind of thing and my mother had that.
Experience and I think it wasn't until really even though I was doing all the fundraising. It wasn't until after he passed away that I was able to really assess my relationship to risk in a new way. Interesting.
Laura Rotter
First of all, I love how you. Well, you yourself as a storyteller are aware of how we create our reality and we create our stories and that's how you just shared some of your past it that you had a story.
not being a risk taker. You of course sparked my interest by saying that there were a number of ways in which you were an out of the box thinker. You shared only one that you studied, Japanese theater. Is there anything else that you remember that you feel comfortable sharing that where you feel like you were outside of the box?
Naomi Vladeck
Yeah. I mean, even, you know, when I studied theater, I had, I had still no idea what, I was going to do with my life that concept of I knew I didn't want to be an actor. I was studying this theater because I sat in the theater one one night. And was listening to a performance of Elektra entirely in Japanese.
And I couldn't leave the theater that night because I was so moved. Something had resonated with me that was beyond language, obviously, but it was something I needed to know more about. I, I experienced some awakening in that moment.That gave me some kind of courage that I'd never had before to take a risk to go completely left of center.
So I, and then I, so I went and I studied this Japanese theater. And at the end of that time, a friend, like we've all experienced folks who see us as we are. In a way that we can't yet see ourselves. We carry that little crumb around with us for a while. And this was one of those moments, a girlfriend at the theater said, she knew I had a passion for just studyingideas, and she also knew that I loved the theater and arts and artists.
And she said, have you ever heard about. the Department of Performance Studies. And it was a relatively young field. It was only a PhD and master's program at the time at NYU and I think Northwestern at that time, only those two universities. And I did apply, I got in and it was, it was an experience that I could never fully or accurately describe to my parents, nor could they ever describe what I was doing.
Like they had children. They were hard pressed to describe what any of us did, but this was a tough one. So that was another experience where I really did it for my own growth. I was not really sure where it would lead me. I didn't have any attachment to the outcome, no sense of real destination even when I went there, but I knew I had to find out more of who I was and that was where I needed to do it.
And so that that was where I did it. It turned out that I got a graduate assistantship there as a fundraiser. And that became a career trajectory that I followed for income my whole life. And it became a way also of me deepening my passion for creativity and artists in general. And telling their stories because I was able to have a career working with them and alongside them and telling their stories.
But that was another strange left of center. I started my own nonprofit. I did a lot of things that I guess in my community don't seem so out there, but it's very exciting. If you value the meandering path or like the zigzagging path of creative living, not just artists, but folks who value risk and can tolerate confusion and uncertainty, which I never thought I was, I'll tell you that right now.
That was absolutely not me and yet it was me and it is so interesting to see how deeply unconscious that story was for me until that certain juncture in my life when I really realized how, how brave I really was all along, even though I didn't know it.
Laura Rotter
So much comes up for me around what you said, Naomi. First of all, you said, my community. So I am sort of curious to explore that. And you also said tolerance for the zigzag path. And, you know, I think so many of us, whether we count ourselves in a particular community, have realized. That's what life is. Like the only constant in life is change. And I do have like several, you know, prose and poetry up on the walls of my closet.
I'm still pretending I'm in college. And, and one of them saying, you know, I always saw my life as a chessboard. And, and then I realized that it's not, it's, it's a canvas.
Naomi Vladeck
I love that. I love that. I love that metaphor. And I use it a lot, which is, you know, that empty space, empty stage, blank page. When we face the blankness ahead of us, we have an opportunity because we enter into transitional period where.
Our creativity is available to us in a different way because nothing is known. Nothing is for sure. Nothing is certain. So it's not that you have to be an artist to be creative during change and transition. It's that the inherent space that opens up has a function. And that function is creative, just inherently creative and spiritual.
And we'll talk about that community piece is, is. Has everything to do with, with worth, financial and self worth. So, hell, I lost myself there. I was thinking about just worth and I got me a little lost. Can you ask me the question again?
Laura Rotter
Well, first of all, community. When you said my community, how are you defining that?
Naomi Vladeck
Yeah. Well, when I think about my people, I think I was talking to a friend today. I said, well, I went to camp when I was 16 and I found my people. And by that I meant, I went to a performing arts camp. It's just like we, my brother and I, the, we, the, we, again, we found our people. These were. Well, they were artists and I, my son went there and the director of the camp said, you know, this is where all the sort of kids who didn't fit in somewhere fit in.
So there was just, you know, it's a safe space to be yourself. There's no bullying or peer pressure. I mean, it's just not. It's not tolerated. There's just the values there are about eccentric creative expression, and there's so much space to play. And I think when you're talking about the zigzagging path, finding community is important to.
Create a safe enough. So we got term I use in the book that came from one of the artists that I love a safe enough space to test these old assumptions and beliefs that we have because it can feel really vulnerable because this notion of failure is just not something in our culture, our contemporary culture that we value.
We think failure is some kind of Dead end or bankruptcy equivalent of, you know, worthlessness, or, you know, it's horrible. You know, some people just feel absolutely crushed if at the concept of just failing at something, whereas the creative process relies on failure. Innovation relies on failure and all this good stuff that we know, but from a feeling space, it can be devastating and prohibitive.
And so the zigzagging path is this experience where we become the agents in our own life. We, it's not just that things happen to us. It's not just that change happens from the outside, but that we have the power to be the creators of our own life. If we cultivate our awareness and conscious. choice making so that we can provoke change if we want to.
And in the book, I wrote a book called Braving Creativity. And in that book, there are stories really that pull out the kind of provocation of change that is the result of desire or desire to Do something different with our lives. It happens in a similar way where we find that our identity is shifting.
We're making a break with who we were and we're turning toward who we want to become. But it's not clear who we want to become necessarily yet. We have to find out who we're becoming. To desire Our self worth as we mature and take risks, and a lot of artists will look for community or creators will look for community who share those values because not everybody wants to grow. So you want to find people who value growth. And I think that's my people. It's the people who are willing to take risks in order to grow.
It's really a huge value of mine. I heard this once, and I really love it, the saying that either when we make a change, it's either because we've had enough suffering, or we have a big enough vision.And I love that, because I think that's really true to the point that you're making, that it's not always the external catalyst, but either we're done suffering.
You know, you've heard the story a million times over a team, you know, when you're younger and you have in a relationship and you get so tired of hearing yourself say the same old thing about how he never, and he always. And you say, I just can't tolerate myself in this space anymore. And then there's also this powerful other pieces where we have this vision for ourselves that is just so compelling that it pulls us into uncertainty and onto a path that maybe feel like a, an abrupt shift, even if it takes.
Time to manifest their bully
Laura Rotter
Very true and I also resonate more with the like you can't deal with the with the suffering anymore. Not so much of having a grand vision and it took me. I mean, it took me quite a long time. Once I was miserable on Wall Street. It still took me about a decade to leave. And I had, I guess I'd refer to her as a spiritual director, but a rabbi, I had a relationship where she was a meditation teacher.
And she said, Laura, it's just not painful enough. You know, when it's painful enough, you'll leave. And.
Naomi Vladeck
Wow. It's such a hard lesson to learn. I, it really is hard. You can't, you really can't force people to make change. I mean, when, when clients come to me, they're, they've really gotten to that point on their own.
I don't bring people to that place. They've arrived by the time they've come to me, which is why I work with so many women in our cohort because they are. Disposed to being in this position, you know, in a sense, like there we've lots of changes already happening around us. Children are going, you know, empty nesting.
We're moving through menopause. Some of us are getting divorced or spouses are dying. Some sometimes there, you know, we've been downsized or removing. Sometimes we've been in a career like you were saying for 10 to 15 years and it just doesn't work anymore. But you feel like you've met that threshold for tolerating the suffering.
So that's, I find that that is not that that, you know, not that people who are, you know, younger, aren't feeling the pain of transition. And I do think, you know, to go back to what you just said about community, I think belonging is such a, an important need right up there with like food and shelter and water that.
It's important on on a practical level to feel that you are belonging to some community of others, but and ultimately critical that you feel a belonging inside of yourself that you belong here that if I'm making this choice to be a spiritual leader to be a coach. It doesn't matter if I have every bell and whistle or every, you know, T cross and I dotted, I belong in this space.
And that's that kind of worth and worthiness is just critical to making An impact to starting to really flourish in in the life that you're trying to create in your in yourself That's a beautiful place to be to feel belonging in yourself. It took me a long time to get there.
Laura Rotter
I would say it's, it's probably one of the hardest things to achieve, to be your own best friend.
And you've mentioned the
term, you know, near and dear to my heart, but it's sort of not well defined terms spiritual or spirituality. So, you know, man, I'm so curious. I know you've been through a lot of changes in your life. If you could, you know, walk our listeners through your personal life change and what role spiritual spirituality, you know, played in it.
Naomi Vladeck
Well, thank you. It's such a great question. I, you know, I grew up as a Jew and I was Bob Mitzford and, I I didn't really feel a connection to God in particular. It wasn't until I think I was in college and my grandfather passed away that I had a spiritual experience that was not connected to my Judaism, but definitely connect connected to him.
And he was a religious man and that was really comforting. It was comforting to have a sense of his presence, even though he wasn't there. Then I really can only connect to spiritual sort of growth once I started to connect to my own desire to grow internally myself. I wasI knew I was passionate about personal growth, but I didn't really consider that had a companion piece of spiritual growth in the beginning.
I thought it was just about, you know, getting to know my gifts, my talents, my strengths, my weaknesses, how many assessments I did. I did all the assessments, every kind of assessment. I did it, you know, trying to know who I was, but I don't really think, and I'm thinking about this really fresh with this question.
So, but I think that's true until, until I became a parent, probably, and this question of deep Love being a spiritual experience started to become palpable in some non verbal way to me, and I'll just jump to, you know, after my husband died, I remember standing in dorm with my kids. It was a camp, but it was like lots of bunks in there.
And we were on a weekend of like a YMCA weekend, like a family camp. And I was looking at my kids and they were so just adorable sleeping there in their bunks. And I thought like, does it matter? Does my love count if nobody else is there to witness it? And then I felt that. It did. I felt that I was really the witness and that that was enough that my love was enough to hold the center of this family essentially.
And then after my husband died, I remember and I write about this in the book standing like in the foyer between the living room. And the kitchen and in an instant, I was just overwhelmed by love, this massive feeling of love that was so big, bigger than I'd ever experienced it before it was both the love I had for myself and all the love in the world at the same time.
And it was a realization that my love didn't die with my husband, that it was always here. And it will always be here because it's, it's not just myself love that knows that I'm worth all the, you know, worth this presence in this space on this planet, but everyone is, and that was a real game changing moment for me.
Andthere's a lovely phrase that I was. Privy to hearing by Tammy Simon, who's the founder of Sounds True, said she was telling a story about being at work and one of her colleagues said, you know, Tammy, you can do 30 percent of the work. I do 30 percent of hard work on my life. I exert 30 percent of effort.
And the universe does 70%. And Tammy was like, 70%. It's a lot. But imagine if we believed, you know, I think that was her challenge to us that the universe could do 70 percent do your 30 percent like a boss, but imagine that the universe can do 70. And it's, it's a really liberating concept because When we're efforting to such a degree as many of us do and women do, we lose sight of the larger dialogue that we're having with energetic field around us and other people.
And I just, so I just love when those things happen and they happen a lot. So we do effort, but we also let go and release our effort into the universe and, and, and stay open to what. We can receive in return those messages and the guidance that's available if we're constantly efforting, constantly doing everything for everyone and all the things that we, that I certainly did.
We won't receive. We can't receive. We're not open. We're too scared.
Laura Rotter
It's very true. I, I, I am a believer that we need practices in place though to open ourself. We're, we're such human doings as opposed to human beings.
Naomi Vladeck
Yes. I mean, one of the biggest practices for me wasn't really a spiritual practice. It, it, it's coming to mind now because so many women Because of all the doing of things, we don't ask for help very often and setting boundaries that allow people to know our feelings and needs is such a liberating experience.
It's unbelievable because we think that if we ask for help, or we state a preference, or wemake a simple request that the sky is going to fall down around us, and when we do it and learn to do it safely, we not only free ourselves from this story that if I don't do it, it won't get done, or if I don't do it, I won't be liked, or if I don't do it, I'm a bad person or whatever, or I'm ultimately just afraid of Of relying on someone else because I'm, I'm, I'm wounded in some real way from my, my past.
We also don't let other people experience our authentic self and we don't let themhave the opportunity. To step in and serve us and in relationship. It's just so it's so critical, but it was something I really had to learn. My husband was an alcoholic and I grew up very much a fixer pleaser in my family and I had to really do some deep diving after he died.
Well, while he was sick, but also after he died to own my part in how I withheldreally critical parts of myself because I was afraid of. the vulnerability in that kind of intimacy. And I have done that work. I have done that, but I, but learning the language ofrequests and boundary setting really, really, really important and hard, really hard to do.
Laura Rotter
Yeah.
Naomi Vladeck
Yeah.
Laura Rotter
Naomi, um, how long ago did your husband pass away?
Naomi Vladeck
He passed away eight years ago in September. It was the first day of school for my son who was a second grader and my daughter who was a fifth grader.
Laura Rotter
Oh, so your kids were, yeah. And what were the, your strengths that helped you? Get through it.
And one of them, I'm assuming you had support to learn how to get support.
Naomi Vladeck
That's right. Yes, I was so I'm a firm. I'm a big, big believer in resourcing ourselves. And this goes to community to in every sphere, including financial. We don't have to know everything and we shouldn't even try. So I really resourced my kids.
Like we went to bereavement groups while we were in therapy. We did family therapy. We did art therapy. We did, you know, things with our community, our Jewish community. And, and I hosted lots of events at my house, you know, so that we had holidays. We had. You know, experiences at our home. Well, absolutely.
Deep diving with my therapist on a weekly basis. One of the others was that I definitely am, as I said before, a glass half full gal. My mother always says she didn't get that for me, which I'm thinking means that I, she thinks I got it from my grandma, Irene, but I just have been a person who just believes that it's going to be okay.
AndEven immediately after my husband died, really soon after my husband died, I think I say this in the book. I can't remember. I was almost like embarrassed to say it or, you know, afraid to say it out loud, but I knew that there was a reason for this, that this, that his dying was. To help us move on because he wasn't going to survive this and do I wish it was any other way.
Of course, of course, I do. But the fact was that it wasn't any other way. And this way was the gift. He could give us in a sense to find our way and heal and become the soulful people that. My children are becoming and so I think that was part of it is that I, I knew that this was,this was the best option given all the options that were in front of us at that time, unfortunately, but so, so, so that is one huge thing that I was able to know pretty soon.
So I didn't wallow in sort of hopelessness. I felt hopeless at times. I felt sad at times. A lot of times I felt bereaved. I felt angry. I mean, I felt, I still have such an inconsolable place in my heart for what my children didn't have, you know, of course, and that doesn't go away. And I also know that, that there are gifts to be had in grief and Gratitude is one of them, you know, and, and I really do feel that gratitude to, to Eric and to so many people who have been great teachers along the way of these past eight years.
Laura Rotter
So it sounds like you were, you had the ability Naomi to reframe and, and see in a certain sense. And so then what shifted in your life? Were you working?
Naomi Vladeck
So there was a point where I was resisting. A lot of the letting go. I definitely did resist a lot of the, the letting go. I was able to turn toward my, my actual creative practice of writing in graduate school.
I studied performance art and when I was able to turn toward my, my actual creative practice of writing in graduate school. I studied performance art and when Things are hard in my life. I tend to write about them and I did turn to writing and performance to write some of these most difficult experiences I was having, especially in the dating arena.
And so I did that and that really was the catalyst for the book, Brave and Creativity, because I, I wondered, what is it about this moment that makes it possible to share some incredibly personal details to an audience, things that I wouldn't tell my therapist, really, I was too embarrassed or ashamed. And find catharsis there.
The, the willingness to grapple with hard things in order to transform our relationship to them, to fear, to risk. Whydid I do that? And wow, was that brave? You know, so that's sort of, you know, what I, what I found that many artistshad that reaction to what they were doing. Wow, that's brave. You're like, well, is it brave?
I didn't realize I was brave. This is just how I have to grab. I have, this is the only way I know how to make sense of a world that is chaotic and difficult to understand. So, and so many of the women in the book. have the similar story, especially in the first two, two sections of the book.
Laura Rotter
It's fascinating as someone who, you know, I got to meet you live and hear you tell a story. It was dating related. And that's so fascinating. I am not someone who naturally gravitates
towards performing that, that you're almost.
Well, you are more comfortable sharing your story in that public kind of way than, like you said, more intimately one on one.
Naomi Vladeck
It's really a controlled mechanism, so in a way it's, it's, I'm thinking about this now, it's A way of controlling something that was so out of control.
It was just so out of my conscious control. Those experiences and then writing about it, you know, in a narrative arc that I could interpret. It's my interpretation.It's my telling. But in that doing it, it sort of helps me process. The and control and get control back. That's something that felt really chaotic.
So I think that and the book came out of that, you know, just the reception of the piece in my oh, wow. What did I just do? Oh, okay. I did that. What's the what's the response? Sort of like call and response. I'm going to hear from the universe. And then all of a sudden I see a colleague who's an actress who had a huge crisis in her life.
She wrote a one woman show about it. And it was, then I spoke to her and then I spoke to this one and that one. And, you know, so just taking that risk, the universe did its part.
Laura Rotter
I guess as I'm listening to you, did the universe do its part in getting you to actually think about writing and publishing a book?
Had it?
Naomi Vladeck
Yeah. I love that because As I got, as my healing, as I was more healed and, you know, I did spend, after Eric died, I spent five years working in a non profit as a fundraising director, and it checked off a lot of boxes for me, actually, because it's a lot of it's storytelling and relationship building,which is my, my jam.
I spent five years stabilizing my family, and once I left that job and. I had done some of these performances already. I had committed to my coaching career full time. And once I had done that, I was,you know, it's like, you're open. It's, it's that staying open and, and putting yourself in the arena that you want to be in.
And so. across my field opportunities would show up. And also I would, I would project positively onto other women's experiences. Oh, this woman's doing that. Oh, wow. She's doing that. I, oh, wow. That has energy for me. And that happened enough times around book writing that eventually I got really curious about one program.
And I had Dipped my toe in taking, I, you know, practice what I preach. I took a few small steps into storytelling these, these other women's stories with crisis, grief, desire, and opportunity as, as catalysts and did an Instagram like summit.And that was sort of the beginning. And then I said yes to the book project and then began a 10 month book hybrid book publishing program and I did it in that time. Yeah.
Laura Rotter
Do you mind sharing the name of the program? If there's any listeners? That program was, Oh, it doesn't exist.
Naomi Vladeck
Yeah. No, no, no, no. I'm just trying to remember the university it came out of, but it's called the Creator Institute and It is a hybrid publishing model with Manuscript, LLC, Eric Coaster was the founder of this program, and it came out of Georgetown University.
Laura Rotter
Okay, I can put a link in the show.
Naomi Vladeck
Yeah, it's a community, it's a community writing models there. tagline is never write alone.
Laura Rotter
So, so there's a cohort of people, you know, writing their books together, which I'm hearing the theme of community coming.
Naomi Vladeck
Yeah,absolutely. My, my next big, my next big edge, which I committed to today.
And this, this will bring us to money again, because, you know, when you're an entrepreneur, a solopreneur, as many of your listeners are, you have to invest in your business and a lot, and when you're a solopreneur, that means investing in yourself. And,you know, it's a tough thing to do sometimes when you're not earning, you know, hand over fist.
So.Yes, but my next edge is to just codify a talk based on the book so that I can speak because I can go out and speak more on the book. I speak a lot on the book in certain settings at workshops and book events and such. But I, one of my big visions is to have, you know, a talk based on themes in the book.
Around my personal story. And, and so I am, I'm in it. I'm in it. And I have my first talk on the books and I will have a talk completed by mid March, end of March, just to put out there in the world to communities of women who are interested in talking about big life change and transition and the hunger to grow.
Laura Rotter
I love that. And so I am part of a community of women that write for big publications and one of them and Ted Talks always seem to be an aspiration in that community. So I'm sort of hearing
that in you.
Naomi Vladeck
For sure. I actually found a new community. I'm excited about called Creative Mornings and they have talk series that they do.
And I'm actually, I'm really excited to go to one that's coming up. So I'm giving a little plug for creative mornings. And I think their tagline is Ted talks for the rest of us, but it's a lot of creatives. And, um, yeah, so you can learn more about that at creative mornings. com probably. But before you go there, go to creativity matters, coaching.com.
Laura Rotter
Yes, please. I was going to ask you, can you please tell us about your How you decided to start a coaching practice, what drew you to that and, and who you enjoy working with?
Naomi Vladeck
Yeah. So I started coaching like 30 years ago. I was, uh,
Laura Rotter
before coaching was the thing to do.
Naomi Vladeck
That's right. Actually, I went, many of your listeners will, if you're from New York, you'll know of the learning annex.
And I went to the learning annex and took a course. Well, it wasn't really a course. It was sort of a marketing promo for coaches training Institute CTI. There were two at the time, coach you and CTI, and this was before cell phones. So I would travel on train to DC and did the coach training program for five months.
And fast forward to, I guess, 2013, I had at that point, I was going to launch the business. In earnest, like I had dabbled in coaching after that training, but I hadn't really committed to it. I had aimposter syndrome really badly. And it's just been a thing in my whole life. So it was, it was challenging to embrace that as a career at that time.
But I, in 2013, I had done a business plan and I really was Moving toward that when I had an opportunity to start a nonprofit. So I did that. I started a nonprofit that supported mid career artists. So I was dealing with my niche, mostly women to test new work in small environments, and I ran that for three years and it was, it was great.
It was growing and it was really exciting. And then my husband passed away and no one else. Would take that on and running in our profit is a labor of love from the, from the ground up and I had to get a full time job. And that's when I went back to fundraising. So, to bring this to this financial piece, when just when COVID hit, I Was working from home and my daughter had to go to private school because it wasn't working for her to be in public school.
She had certain challenges and her needs were just no way going to be met. And it was kind of an urgent situation. So I took out a home equity loan and that was the 1st time I had ever done anything remotely like that to take on a loan and take on debt like that. And. It was really liberating, actually, because I understood what I was doing, and I had a sense of a bigger plan, but.
You know, it was imperative. It was imperative for me and my daughter. And, and you have the equity in your home to do it. I have the equity in my home. Equity in on credit cards or something. Exactly. I did do that too, but, but it was, it was a sensical thing to do at the time. And so, yeah, and so that was the time during the COVID that I also committed to coaching.
I was coaching people for free in between my job, you know, and off hours. And there was just such a great response. I took, I did a lot of courses. I got recertified. I did all the things to feel really supported in community. I, I just did a lot of trainings to keep my soul enriched during that time. And it just gave me so much courage to.
Go whole hog into coaching that I did quit my job and do that. And then two and a half years later sold my house and we downsize. And my daughter's at the, you know, at a university, a public university, and it's all good, you know, and I don't have forever where I can grow a business, but I have time to grow a business.
And I really trust in the universe. And I'm incredibly curious. That's my, that is the emotion, the feeling that is the most prevalent in me right now. Genuine curiosity for what will emerge. I really truly am not headed. toward a singular destination. It's, I just, I just trust that as I step fully in to the desire I have to be fully expressed as Naomi, something will show itself that as it does every day in some way or another, the financial piece of it is part of what I leverage, you know, with my work, with my business and with my coach, as I.
You know, build the business, codify things, put value to things, invest in myself, et cetera. So there is risk all along, every day, you know, with making decisions like this one to have another coach, to have a coach, to hire an additional coach for the speaking. So yeah, it's really exciting. I mean, I definitely feel alive, I can tell you that.
Laura Rotter
I can sense that in you. I'm just curious because you didn't say it when you were talking about like what's in place as you Forward you sold the house is part of what's in place that you freed up cash or you lowered expenses or some way that you built a runway. Very familiar to me because that's what I did, you know, 10 years ago.
Naomi Vladeck
Exactly that. I freed up cash. I invested the bulk of it though, freed up cash and I lowered my expenses. And I also have the investment in a A secure investment that I can use the earnings of if I need that will generate enough earning in the short term. If I need a short term boost to my income and that has its own timeline.
So that'll happen for the course of this year. And then I'll see where I'm at at the end of the year. So that's kind of how I'm biting off a chunk. I can. the only chunk I can possibly imagine seeing, which is just this, this year, this financial year.
Laura Rotter
Thank you. It's certainly important to recognize that we can't plan our lives.
And it's so nice with me, what you say, Naomi, which is you're curious, you're putting yourself out there and then magic will happen. And we need to have a financial cushion, just if nothing else, emotionally to really. embrace the magic that comes our way when we're not worried about how we're paying the next bill.
And so as we get to the end of our conversation, Naomi, I just like to ask, how has your definition of success shifted? And it could be financial success or a broader definition, whatever
speaks to you.
Naomi Vladeck
Success to me means No regrets at the end of my days, it means, you know, at the end of my days, I will have spent time getting to know myself and really learning to express the truth and the full volume of who I am.
I mean, that is it. That is success to me. That is absolutely success to me. And I don't know why or where it comes from. I am just so driven to know myself. And to, and to not let my fear get in the way of being fully expressed. And that is story is still being written. And so I'm still on that path and it's, it's really, it's really fun enriching path because it's, because I'm not alone, you know, it's such a, it's a really brief, but very communal path.
I find andyeah, and that's something I won't ever regret. So to me, that is success. It has absolutely actually no dollar value associated with it. You know, look at you. It's just the sweetness I can bring to myself. The love I can bring to myself on the regular is, is success. I mean, it really is success.
Laura Rotter
Thank you so much for sharing that.
Naomi, as we're ending, is there anything else you'd like to share for our listeners who may themselves be going through a big life change?
Naomi Vladeck
You know, allowing yourself to grieve what's, what's gone is really an important piece of the early stages of any big change. We often rush through our grief and it really has a lot in there for us to learn.
So that's usually what I say right up front is to allow yourself to attend to the gaps in any day that where something is rising up. To you to be seen and heard and feltand. Really, until you allow yourself to be with these uncomfortable feelings, you're not gonna advance too far in the knowing of who you are.
And so practicing, you know, all your awareness and self compassion skills in there is just like baseline maintenance for growth. I think, I mean, in my work, I have pillars that I bring people through and it starts with this liberating pillar of of self awareness and self compassion. There's no linear process to growing, but, you know, there are other other practices that you, you.
Know well about learning how to mind our hearts and to listen to our intuition and what our bodies tell us, and all that knowledge there. I think being playful and being willing to take small steps to trust yourself, to test these assumptions and old beliefs are, is critical to, to finding the proof. Of your courage today as the woman you are and have grown yourself up to be, you'll, you'll get to that space of belonging inside yourself where then you're, you're willing and able to share resources and stay open and, and feel empowered to like really declare your worth, whatever that is for you so that you can finally have that runway that you describe where you, you have a sense of how to build yourself, um, Into the horizon forward without knowing without having to rush toward the horizon or run back to the field that you were standing in moments before.
So it's a journey. It is absolutely a journey and a dance and a dance. I'll harken back to my dance career and a zigzagging path that is rich and heartfelt and worthy ofour effort.
Laura Rotter
Beautifully, beautifully said, Naomi. Thank you so much for taking the time to be my guest.
I hope you enjoyed my conversation with Naomi Vladek, a certified creativity coach for artists and creators. And some of my takeaways from our conversation. You can rewrite your story. Naomi grew up accepting the narrative that From among her siblings, she was not the risk taker, and that she was anxious around money and numbers.
She questioned that story and recognized that she has made unconventional choices in her life, including studying Japanese theater, and that she has gone on to become a fundraiser for a career and managed many budgets and spreadsheets over her lifetime. Takeaway number two, Recognize that change is inherently creative.
Naomi didn't intentionally seek out change in her life. She didn't think of herself as someone who could tolerate confusion and uncertainty. And yet, as she reflects on her life's journey, she recognizes that she absolutely values the meandering or zigzagging path of creative living, and that she's been braver than she would have anticipated.
The zigzagging path, as she puts it, is where we can choose to become the agents in our own life. It's not just the change happens from the outside, but that we have the power to be the creators of our own life. Takeaway number three, find your community. Naomi shared her experience of attending a performing arts camp when she was 16 years old and finding her people.
Where the sorts of people who didn't fit in elsewhere, fit in. Finding a community is important to help us find a safe space to test old assumptions and beliefs we have that make us feel. And finally, know that the creative process relies on failure. Culturally, we are taught to abhor failure. We think that failure is a dead end or bankruptcy and can make us feel worthless.
But the truth is just the opposite. The creative process relies on failure. Innovation relies on failure. Are you enjoying this podcast? Don't forget to subscribe so you won't miss next week's episode. And it would be great if you would leave a rating and a review if you're enjoying it, and it'll help other women just like you to find the show.
Thank you so much.
Narrator
Thanks for listening to making change with your money. Certified financial planner, Laura Rotter, specializes in helping people just like you, organized, clarify, and invest their money in order to support a life of purpose and meaning. Go to www. trueabundanceadvisors. com forward slash workbook for a free resource to help you on your journey.
Disclaimer, please remember that the information shared by this podcast does not constitute accounting, legal, tax, investment, or financial advice. It's for information purposes only. You should seek appropriate professional advice for your specific information.