An interview with Claire Brown Kohler, a business coach, public speaker and leadership trainer. We discuss the critical elements of effective leadership, the importance of strategic relationships, the power of collaborating as a team, and the necessity of anticipating future trends.
Claire Brown Kohler is a transformative business coach and leadership trainer, who enjoys working with her clients to set goals, determine priorities and plan strategies. She brings 30+ years of executive level corporate business experience to her work, including growing her previous company to millions of dollars of sales, and managing hundreds of staff and volunteers. Claire empowers her clients to scale up with more direction and greater joy!
Claire shared that she grew up as the oldest of three sisters, with a father who had high expectations of her. He instilled a positive "operating system" within her, a "yesness" to life, which she retains to this day.
Claire graduated from college as an anthropology major. To her father's dismay, her first job was selling popcorn in a movie theater! She eventually ended up owning the movie theater and, together with her partner, expanding the company over several decades into catalog and online sales, retail stores, film festivals and film distribution. Claire's father was an early investor in the company and, as you might imagine, was quite proud of what she accomplished!
After selling the company to a strategic partner for millions of dollars in 2014, Claire found herself drawn to business coaching. As she describes it, she's never been more excited about what she's doing: working with business owners as their strategic partner, their thinking partner, their accountability coach and their cheerleader so they can build stronger organizations.
"I can honestly say all my clients are making more money. I can honestly say that the people that I coach in leadership improve their leadership skills and, and I'm passionate about helping people become better leaders, which starts with you. The hardest person to lead is yourself. So I really believe that you have to start looking at, whether you're leading yourself or you're leading a team of people, you really need to look at who you're being in life." Claire Brown Kohler
Key takeaways:
- Know the value of strategic relationships. One of Claire’s core principles is intentional relationships. She shared that she was introduced to the man who would later become her business partner by an usher at a movie theater, who recognized her after she saw the film Harold and Maude twice! This introduction led to a 33 year relationship that culminated in the successful sale of the company to a strategic partner.
- Recognize the power of working as a team. Claire still has tremendous admiration for the team she worked with for 33 years, noting it was devoid of politics, supportive and collaborative. Quoting the Entrepreneurial Operating System (“EOS”), Claire shared that she, as the Chief Operating Officer, was the integrator while the CEO was the visionary. In other words, everyone on a team has a unique role to play in the organization.
- Anticipate the future. Claire’s previous business evolved from a repertory cinema company to catalog and online sales, retail stores, film festivals and film distribution. The industry underwent a tremendous amount of technological change during this time. In her current coaching practice, Claire considers strategic planning to be a critical aspect of running a business and encourages her clients to stay current on shifts in their industry and to “begin with the end in mind.”
- We bring about what we visualize. Claire worked with a law of attraction coach in 2013 and attributes the successful sale of her former business in 2014 to her belief that abundance was possible. Coupled, of course, with the hard work that she and the CEO put in to make the sale happen. Claire shared the story of how she has helped clients achieve their visions.
About the guest:
Claire Brown Kohler is a Business Coach, Public Speaker, and Leadership Trainer. As the owner of We Empower Leaders, she focuses on guiding leaders and business owners to address themselves and their teams with empathy, insight, passion, and an inspired vision for the future. With over 30 years of executive-level corporate leadership and business experience, she inspires people to achieve more, earn more, and produce more – with intentionality. Her clients are business owners looking to take their business to the next level or struggling with challenges and changes. Her leadership training focuses on the importance of Personal Development, Emotional Intelligence, and Strategic Goal Setting.
Email address: claire@weempowerleaders.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/WeEmpowerLeaders
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/clairebkohler/
Website: https://www.weempowerleaders.com/
Free resources: Goals and Vision Worksheet
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Claire Brown Kohler
I can honestly say all my clients are making more money. I can honestly say that the people that I coach in leadership improve their leadership skills and, and I'm passionate about helping people become better leaders, which starts with you. The hardest person to lead is yourself. So I really believe that you have to start looking at whether you're leading yourself or you're leading a team of people.
You really need to look at who you're being in life.
Narrator
Welcome to making change with your money, a podcast that highlights the stories and strategies of women who experienced a big life transition and overcame challenges as they redefined financial success for themselves. Now, here's your host. Certified Financial Planner, Laura Rotter.
Laura Rotter
I am so excited to have as my guest today, Claire Brown Kohler. Claire is a business coach,
public speaker, and leadership trainer. As the owner of We Empower Leaders, she focuses on guiding leaders and business owners to address themselves and their teams with empathy, insight, passion. And an inspired vision for the future.
Her clients are business owners, perhaps just like you looking to take their business to the next level or struggling with challenges and changes. So welcome Claire to the making change with your money podcast.
Claire Brown Kohler
Thank you. I'm very, very pleased and flattered to be here. You have, I, I went through your roster of former guests and I had to have a little conversation with myself about imposter syndrome because you've had a spectacular lineup and I listened to several of them and learned a lot and was very inspired.
Laura Rotter
So thank you so much. Excellent company. So then you'll be aware of the question I always start with, which is what was money like in your family, Claire, growing up?
Claire Brown Kohler
I'm really glad I thought about this question because I don't know that I, I have thought about it some. Money was mysterious. It was not discussed.
In fact, when I applied for college, my father wanted me to apply for financial aid, but refused to put his income down on the financial statements. And I'm, I'm completely perplexed by this. I just don't get it. Dad, how do you think they're going to give us money if they don't, if you're not going to tell them how much money you make?
And we were quite comfortable. And I will date myself here to say that my college, which was, you know, almost an Ivy league college was 4, 000 a year. So, you know, expenses that were very different back then. And he just refused. He said, I'm not going to do it. And I said, well, then I can't apply for financial aid.
And that, you know, and then I started thinking about. High school and the jobs that I had through high school and college that my sisters, I don't remember them really working through high school or college. Well, I was the only one that went to college, but no, my, my younger sister went, I mean, I, I, uh, babysat.
I literally crocheted shawls, which I sold, you know, and I worked at a Hardee's and a hideous orange. polyester uniform. And then in college, I, I took care of a kid that had broken his leg and I did, I did a bunch of different things. And I, but I don't remember having a conversation with my parents about why I did that and why my sisters didn't.
So it was never talked about. And transparently money's not been money flows to me and I need to be more attentive. I'm not, but it just keeps coming. So it's just one of those mysteries. It's continued to be a mystery.
Laura Rotter
It's a beautiful thing though. The idea, I love the word of. I think you used the word flow, that money flows to you.
I'm curious, Claire, so you said you have sisters, you have several sisters, I guess. How, how many are you? Two, two sisters. So there's three girls all together in your family?
Claire Brown Kohler
Yes, which my father swore made him very happy. Interesting. So you, you did or didn't believe him? Well, in retrospect, I think he treated me like the son because he was always pushing me.
And had high expectations of me, more so than my sisters. So, in retrospect, I think I was the surrogate son, which was fine with me.
Laura Rotter
And you're the oldest in the birth order?
Claire Brown Kohler
Yes.
Laura Rotter
Interesting. So, could you let us know how, in what way Did you feel like you were the surrogate son? What were the expectations? Were they academic? Were they
professional?
Claire Brown Kohler
They were a combination of both. I think he just expected that I would go to college and there was, he was very supportive. He would always say to us, you can do whatever you put your mind to. And my, my big thing to him was, all right, dad, what about putting toothpaste back in a toothpaste tube?
But, oh my God, you are a pain, but I've actually done that. If you, if you, if you manipulate the toothpaste tube, you can actually suck it back in. So I thought, okay, dad, True to you right on that one. So, he was just always very supportive, but I graduated from college and my first job was selling popcorn in a movie theater.
To his great distress. At first I thought I was going to move to Philadelphia and become a postman. Postwoman. I had no idea. My college had zero career counseling. I was an anthropology major.And, yeah, I see the world as one big place. We are, you know, We are unified. And so I got there and I have a I have a whole story about what happened, but I ended up owning the movie theater.
And so then he was. His heart, his Republican corporate heart burst with pride over the fact, and he was actually an early investor for us. We repaid his investment, but he was an early investor in the company and was so proud of what we accomplished. So I benefited from his positive and I've, I've interviewed people to find out before we're seven years old, we absorb what we're told like little sponges were really most of us I've met one or two exceptions do not have the ability to discern whether that is what we want to believe or not.
And until you question it, that becomes our internal operating system. And I was very lucky that he instilled a very positive operating system in me. So, in high school, a friend of mine said, Claire, I love your yes ness of life. And, so I've just always been that way. Although my sisters are not, so I don't know.
I had an astrologer who said I was a cat raised among dogs. So, um, I took it to heart in a way that they didn't.
Laura Rotter
What role did your mother play since you haven't mentioned her?
Claire Brown Kohler
My mother was a bridge player who went to play bridge in the morning, came home in the afternoon, made dinner and did her own thing.
And I love my mother, but she was not, I just don't really remember her being there very much growing up. She was completely devoted to my father. Our world revolved around Bridge
and my father.
Laura Rotter
Interesting, so your father almost had more of a hands on, certainly emotional, caregiving role more than your mother did?
Claire Brown Kohler
Yes, over the dinner table. We had, we, we got lectures over the dinner table. So, and instructions over the dinner table. So that was the main family interaction.
Laura Rotter
And were either of them college graduates or were you?
Claire Brown Kohler
My father was. Ironically, he went to Brown, and his name was Brown, my maiden name is Brown.
My mother went to Catherine Gibbs Secretarial School. And remembered shorthand for the rest of her life, actually.
Laura Rotter
I think it's a great skill, probably.
Claire Brown Kohler
I wish I had it.
Laura Rotter
And did you go away to college, or were you, were you living at home when you went to?
Claire Brown Kohler
No, I went away. So I vowed that I wouldn't go to a women's college, and then I went to a women's college, which doesn't exist anymore.
It's complicated. It was Kirkland College, which was founded by Hamilton College. And after 12 years or seven, eight years, I think it was, they decided to just go co ed and merge everything. So I am one of 1200 Kirkland graduates. My name is enshrined in a wall in the Hamilton college on the Hamilton campus.
So I just had a conversation with the only alumni I've really kept in touch with and she, and I said, I, you know, I'm still resentful. And she said, get over it. Claire Hamilton is a great school. They're doing great things. Get over your resentment. So I said, you know what? Alright, I'm over it.
Laura Rotter
And was Kirkland similar to Hamilton because it is sort of non alternative, if you will, in terms of,
Claire Brown Kohler
Hamilton was very strict.
They had fraternities, they had required grades, they had exams. Kirkland had no required courses, you could make up your own major, we had no grades, we had evaluations, our student government was half students, half teachers, and the student government made critical decisions. I was on a committee called Kirkland as a college for women.
It was started during the education revolution in the late 60s. So we, I wore a button that said Uppity Women Unite.
We freaked those men out.
Laura Rotter
So I get the sense, Clare, that you had an entrepreneurial outside of the box personality. From the get go, right? As you described challenging your dad that you could put toothpaste back in the tube. So how did that affect your choices? And you said, we started, you know, bought a movie theater. Who was we, what was your path?
Claire Brown Kohler
Well, one of my core. Principles is intentional relationships. So, as I was working in the movie theater, I owe it all to Harold and Maude, classic. And, I was working in the movie theater, my manager at the time said, you have to go see Harold and Maude, so I went to see it. I saw it twice.
The usher recognized me from the other movie theater, he and I became friends, and he introduced me to a man that, I dated for a brief period of time, turns out he was really gay, but we, I was the, the last woman that he dated, we became friends and he started a business. And he was renting the Tower Theater in Philadelphia, not for Darby, to rent for movies and started a company.
And I said, I'm going to be part of the company and I love him dearly, but he's very much a chauvinist pig. And he said, no. And so he gave me a test. I had to. Research and find our very first printer. Cause we had printed program guides cause this was before the internet.And so I, I was the number two in the company for 33 years and he was number one, so 33 years, we two movie theaters, seven video stores.
29 different film festivals, 10 of the international, Philadelphia International Gay and Lesbian Film Festival, 29, 19 of those and 10 Philadelphia Film Festivals. We started a film distribution line, we had a division in the UK, we had a store in New York City, and it was quite An amazing, amazing time. I was tremendously blessed.
We got up to 250 employees and 16 million in revenue. And it was a, an amazing experience that I am so glad to have gone through.
Laura Rotter
This is, feels like a big ask, but. Could you sort of summarize for our listeners what you feel you came away from that experience with? I mean, it sounds as you said, like, especially you, you started pretty much out of college, correct?
Claire Brown Kohler
Well, I had a series of jobs. We started the company when I was 28 or 29. Oh, I usually say I've started very young when I say we were together for 33 years, butthe secret is out. What I'd walked away with was The power of working as a team is one thing. I disagreed with a lot of my business partners leadership style, but one thing that I have tremendous admiration for is that he created a management team that was devoid primarily of politics.
It was a little bit rotating, but the final 20 years, there was a core, you know, four or five of us We were in and out of each other's offices. We supported each other. We collaborated. We, we really worked as a beautiful team. He, if you know EOS, he was the visionary and I was the integrator. And, but he just, he made sure that when we made a decision, we made it as a team for the most part.
Occasionally, he would decide something and we would go with it. Well, there were a couple of major projects he decided we were going to do, and then we all kind of went along. But I would say that was one of the key things. And the power of your people. I was, you know, the one that, as the COO, I oversaw all the people, and we had phenomenal people.
In fact, I was just at a networking event last week, and I saw one of the managers of my store, In Chestnut Hill, who I have not seen in 12 years, and I said, Chris, and he said, Claire, and it was awesome. And I think we've done a couple of reunion staff reunions and, and they have said, you know, I've never worked anywhere as great as TLA and I still miss it.
And, and he said, you know, a few of us have been talking about a reunion. And I said, I'm in. So I think the people, the collaboration and. And the power of strategic planning, because one of the things that Ray excelled at was every year until the last year or two, when we were really struggling with changing technology was the ability to really say, this is my vision for the upcoming year.
This is what we're going to do. Got all of us in alignment. And then we, we figured out how we were going to make that vision happen. Uh, just the, the one that always sticks in my head in terms of making changes, right, for technology was. You know, we started in movie theaters, and then we saw movie theaters evolve and change into video stores.
And I'm actually having dinner tonight with the banker who financed our video stores. He had his own video store two miles from where I live. And he said, you guys have to get into the video business, and our bank will finance you. So we shifted from movie theaters to video stores, and then we saw that it was all going to go online.
Well, first we had to make the transition from VHS to DVD. There was that brief stint of LaserDisc. Well, even in the beginning, you had to decide between Beta and VHS. And he correctly called Beta. He correctly called Laserdisc. Wasn't going to work out. He correctly saw that the internet was the way to go.
So we developed a whole online presence. And then he was gay and he wanted to start a gay film festival. And we said, sure. We closed the theaters. We said, sure, let's do it. Do that. And then out of that, the University of Pennsylvania approached us and said, Hey, would you take over what was then known as the Philadelphia Festival of World Cinema?
We renamed it the Philadelphia Film Festival, and it's still running. We ran it for 10 years. It's a huge success. Very proud of what they've done there. And, but he just kept having this vision of where we where we needed to go, aligned us as a team behind him, and then we went. So strategic planning, anticipating the future, are really critical aspects, I think, to anything, right?
In my five pillars of leadership, it's a critical aspect, looking ahead and understanding where you need to go. in anticipation, as Covey says, begin with the end in mind.
Laura Rotter
I mean, it's really such an extraordinary story, Claire, as I, you know, this morning was reading about Netflix because they're about to report their earnings.
And you lived through that huge industry shift of how we consume entertainment, how we consume films, entertainment, and That whole lifespan, as you described, of 33 years was such a big shift.
Claire Brown Kohler
Well, you know, one of the brilliant things was because we were doing the Gay Film Festival, we saw so many gay films that weren't being picked up for distribution.
So we started a film distribution line because in those days, you know, now you could see gay characters on TV all the time. Will and Grace was really kind of, you know, ground setting for that, but this was before that. And so we had movies that gay people wanted to see that they couldn't find anywhere.
So we started a film distribution line and then. Blockbuster and Hollywood became our clients. We sold to them and then Netflix and Amazon streaming and, and Netflix online became our clients. So we were able to take this new technology for quite a while and use it to our advantage until streaming.
Streaming was really where we couldn't keep up. That, that was. Although the gentleman that bought our company still has a Roku channel. TLA Video exists on Roku.I was talking to a, one of the, my four employees who still works for them, and when we met last summer, the number one film on the channel was about two gay men in their 60s reliving the highlights of their youth.
And, big seller for them, so. He's doing it on a, you know, on a smaller basis, but, but we were able to really ride the wave for quite a while, just changing each technology. It's important now you got to understand, you know, I'm constantly watching marketing and figuring out personally, I just learned Kajabi, which is an online course system because I'm going to be launching a leadership training course.
And so, okay, time to learn a new technology. So I've learned Kajabi and you just have to stay current. You have to stay current.
Laura Rotter
You, you bring up the question I'm about to ask. So first of all, when was the end of the 33 years? Like how long ago was that that you had to yourself personally start to pivot?
Claire Brown Kohler
Let me just say that my partner. In the last couple of years was not a happy person and I was the brunt of a lot of his unhappiness. So I became very discontent and I happened to find a law of attraction coach that I started to work with. When was that? So 2012 we were valued at zero as a company and I won't go into the reasons why but we were valued at zero.
And then I started working with her in 2013 and I, I wrote this letter to myself. They did 12 31 13 in which I imagined and believed in a change that included abundance and new ways of living and freedom and that was in April of 2013 and in August a call came in from one of our associates who said I want to buy the company and everybody laughed and I called him back and I said, let's make this happen.
So in January 2014 we sold for millions. Despite the fact that we've been valued for zero. And to me, this is my number one law of attraction story. That what we think about, we bring about, what we visualize, we materialize. You have to have a very practical approach. You can't just sit back and wish for this to happen.
I actively worked alongside Derek to make this sale happen, but it was my, I'm very clear that it was my intention that played a huge role in this outcome because it was truly a miracle, truly a miracle.
Laura Rotter
So that was in 2014 that the company sold, so a decade ago.
Claire Brown Kohler
Yep. I'm seeing him for the first time in 10 years tomorrow night.
Laura Rotter
So then how did that evolve to where you are today? What were the decisions that played
into?
Claire Brown Kohler
It was a, it's been a long and winding road. I'll be honest. I found business coaching and2015, I became a John Maxwell leadership, certified leadership coach. I did HR for a bit because I saw that business owners knew that they had a problem with their employees, but they didn't always see that the problem was them.
Laura Rotter
I love that.
Claire Brown Kohler
So, so I've done a bunch of different things over the years. And really over the last year, including I took a job for much of 20, 22 into 23, because I really missed that team. I miss that collaboration. I missed having a home. I'm an entrepreneur, but I'm also a team player.And I took that job for a year until I realized I really needed to go back to my roots.
I, I really love working with business owners. I love being their strategic partner, their thinking partner, their accountability coach, their cheerleader, their, and in many cases, helping them promote and, and bring on their management team to create a stronger company. So it was a very tough decision. I was eventually sucked in.
So, you know, went from a day a week to two days a week to three days a week to four days a week, working with them to making the decision to go back out on my own. So since then, I really focused on working with business owners And doing leadership training and I, I've never been more excited about what I'm doing.
Laura Rotter
That's a big statement.
Claire Brown Kohler
I wake up inspired and passionate every day and because I believe in, you know, I can honestly say all my clients are making more money. I can honestly say that the people that I coach in leadership improve their leadership skills and, and I'm passionate about helping people become better leaders,which starts with you.
The hardest person to lead is yourself. So I really believe that you have to start looking at whether you're leading yourself or you're leading a team of people, you really need to look at who you're being in life. And this is where the cat and dog dichotomy with my family is really Very stark because I'm constantly examining.
I'm constantly looking at how I can grow and as my sister said to me many times Stop analyzing so much and I don't understand anything you're talking about. So I love learning and I love growing That's why I was I was listening to your podcast I was also looking at your I forget what you call your guide to money your free gift that you give to people.
Laura Rotter
Yeah The money blocks, unblock your money blocks.
Claire Brown Kohler
I love that. So much of what you, uh, what you address there are things that I think are really critical. And that we overlap, taking care of yourself. I think one thing when you lead yourself is self compassion is so critical. Right? If you ask yourself, would I say what I'm saying to myself to my best friend, and if the answer is no, then you need to change the conversation.
You know, I, I, I have, I'm not very systematic, but in terms of how I think I'm systematic. So I have my seven steps to determine your destiny. And the number one thing is your mindset. You have to understand. Where your mind is and how you approach things. And I, I really think the, the more positive you approach things, the better off you are.
And so I love that, that, you know, and taking care of yourself is part of that. Like you, you deserve. I have a friend who, this is, she talks about it all the time, Lauren Weinberg, is what, you know, you are worthy, what do you deserve, and a lot of times people don't think they deserve to take care of themselves.
So I love that in there, and then replacing the blocks is critical, what we tell ourselves. is so important. And I, I love how you bring that up and you give the option of, this is what I have said to myself. This is a new conversation that I can say. And I've led a workshop called live by design, not by default.
And this is, you know, the underlying premise. I actually have a limiting belief worksheet that I offer to people, you know, what's your limiting belief and what can you replace it with? And one of the critical elements when you replace a limiting belief is that. You, it has to be something you believe. If you reach too far, your brain will not believe it.
So if you say, I'm going to make a million dollars, your brain says, ha ha. But if you pick something that's within reason, you know, I want to make wherever you are, right? I want to make 80, 000. I want to make 120, 000. I, I intend to, the words are important. I intend to make 200, 000. If you can, It's a, if it's a stretch, but you still believe it, then you're much more likely to live into that new belief.
So I love that you say that. And then the whole taking action, critical, critical.I'm rolling out a new talk now called Empowering Leadership, Transforming Your Personal and Professional Life. And the three elements of it are, is a commitment to personal growth and self awareness. Because you have to know who you are.
And the second of it is build purposeful, intentional relationships. Because that's where your outside perspective and your support in time of trouble. And then the third thing is take meaningful action in the direction of your goals. And so many great ideas get lost in the shower. So I, I hope people really download that very wonderful free gift that you give people.
Laura Rotter
Thanks, Claire. And so, so many things come up when you just spoke. First of all, when you were telling the story about your sister saying, stop analyzing, I was going to ask exactly what you ended up saying, which is, you know, as a mindfulness practitioner, it's so easy to sit and watch oneself and fall into self judgment.
And if you don't bring the kindness and the self compassion, then You know, we're just constantly naming and listing our faults. And as you said, that's not helpful. I'm also curious as I really wrestle with the fact that I'm a pretty driven person, right? A type A personality. And as I've aged, I wrestle and contend with this voice that says, Laura, you can't control outcomes.
You can't control everything. Take a deep breath and perhaps surrender a bit. And so I'm wondering, Claire, where is, how does that interaction work for you between taking action and surrendering to the mystery and recognizing that it's not all up to you?
Claire Brown Kohler
I love that question. I think there's an element of intuition involved and I was just on a call this morning with a woman that practices intuition that we were asking her what her marketing technique was and she said intuition and she really is. I think that step 2 of my determine your destiny is knowing your core values so if you know what your core values are so mine is one of my number 1 is to be a value be of service.
So that surrender right like sometimes I think to be a service looks like this. And sometimes to be of service looks like this. And it's, it's very difficult to be committed to how you're being in the moment without necessarily being attached to the outcome. And I think that's where the surrender comes in that, well, I also believe that there is no failure.
There are only lessons for learning. Out of every adversity come the seeds of opportunity, and the problem is we fight against the adversity and we neglect to look for the opportunity. I think that's another area where the surrender comes in. And then one of my favorite quotes, Viktor Frankl, right, between stimulus and response, there is a space and in that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response and in our response is our growth and our happiness.
So I really think that if you look at life knowing that it's working for you, even when it looks like it's not, and you look for the good in everything, no matter what, then surrender becomes a little bit easier. I don't know if that answered your question.
Laura Rotter
Well, perhaps do you have an example in your life where you faced some form of adversity and you worked with it, at least emotionally, and had it work for you?
Claire Brown Kohler
You know, I wish I could say that I am so wise at this age, but I was recently in a situation where I was being bullied, and I'm not used to that. And this person actually said some very mean things. That I had to really work on my reaction to in a way that I don't know that I've ever had to in my life.
And so I was on, I've created a little mini group of three other coaches. We've been meeting for three years every other week. And we were talking about that because even though it was a year ago, some of this, I can't help myself. Some of those, some of his comments still bubble up just like, I don't even know.
My, I'm, I feel compassion that he would feel that need to say something so mean, but they said you should really write him a thank you letter because it's had me, it's had me look very deep at what cord did he touch that's been lying under the surface all these years that I now have this amazing opportunity to confront and, and bring out into the open and heal.
And when I look, there's, this was certainly the most extreme case of it, but I've had other people in my life that have said things to me that were not fine, and I've let it go, and I stood up to him, and I said, you know, you can't, it's mean that you're doing this, people notice it. You know, it's, it doesn't make you look good because people like me and they're, you know, and they've said things to me about what you're saying to me and they don't like it.
And,you know, thank you for making me confront this. I literally said that to him. So, you know, life is always full of opportunities to. Confront an adversity and see where the silver lining is and come out the other side.
Laura Rotter
Thank you so much for sharing that. And I would agree, Claire, that when something really rocks you to the core, especially something someone says or the way someone acts.
I do also use it as a raw shock of. Are they reflecting something inside you? Like why are you getting such a strong reaction? It sounds like what you described, maybe anybody would have a strong reaction, but there are certainly relationships that friends of mine, it just rolls off them. But to me it just, you know, sticks with me and I almost use it as a mirror.
Like what is it reflecting back at you that you can't even tolerate being in this person's? presence. And it's, it's quite interesting. I guess I also feel drawn to Cher because in some ways I, you know, I just love your affect and your vibe. So I pick tarot cards as I start the new year. And I would say that All the cards I've picked reflect the concept of working with things that don't go my way.
And what can I learn from that? Almost to the point where I felt like, I want to put all these cards back. And then I'm like, you know, but they're giving you the same message. Which is, you're entering 2024. And how do you want to make lemonade from From what I perceive as lemons, perhaps, and that's exactly what you've been talking about.
So, as we come towards the end of our conversation, I'm, I'm curious, please, you know, tell, you know, tell our listeners about the coaching practice you've. You're delivering right now and how that's reflecting who you have come to know yourself to be, you know, warts and skills and all.
Claire Brown Kohler
I love coaching. I have a very practical approach.
Right, like you have to have goals and you have to have measurements and you have to have techniques for hitting those goals. And we look at everything from the marketing to the people to the competition revenues, you know, you have to look at the complete package. And then there's also the mindset element of things, although many of the business.
Owners that I work with, I call them unconscious manifestos. They're already very successful, but they've done it not knowing and not acknowledging that power that they have to manifest. So I have a client that two years ago, he told me his vision. They do home remodeling, and he told me his vision of the location that he wanted to create.
And it looked impossible, and I said, you know what? You are an incredible manifester. You are going to manifest this. And. In December, they bought the building next door. So they had spent a lot of money in the building that they're in. So they're going to be able to take advantage of the building that they're in.
Now, the building next door is perfect. They're going to be able to create that vision that he had 2 years ago. And so. But how we got there was, what does the zoning board say? What does the architect say? You know, what is the team looking to get out of this building? So there's both a mindset and a very practical approach that I take.
And the other thing is leadership training, because So many times you want to promote somebody because they have a skill or a talent, but that does not mean that they know how to lead people. 10 percent of the population is a natural born leader. Now, whether they're good leaders or not is, you know, is questionable.
10 percent of the population will never be a good leader. And I, I promoted somebody at one point. I said, you know, if you, he didn't, he was very iffy about it. I said, we're going to promote, you know, leading the team. If it works, great. And if it doesn't, we're going to undo this with no recrimination. He hated it.
So we undid it. He was in that 10%. He'll never be a natural leader, but you know that you have 80 percent of that group in the middle that can learn techniques and approaches that will help them connect to their people better. That will help them. A lot of times people get promoted over others. And there's this resentment.
How you navigate that you have a challenge. You've got a conflict on the team. How do you navigate that? And there are definitely tools that you can use and, and skills that you can acquire that help you become better leaders. And I am passionate about helping people achieve more effective leadership because it makes such, people leave companies, they leave leaders, they don't leave the companies.
You know, my daughter works for somebody right now who probably won't listen to this, but if she does, you know, yells at her team in front of customers. And it's so wrong. Yells at the team, you know, praise. I think I was listening to one of your people that said praise in, in public and criticize in private.
So basic,it's not something everybody knows. I had led this leadership cohort two years ago. I developed my leadership training with an army special ops ranger. I was very blessed to have him help me design the material. In the first cohort, we had a business owner in there and I said, why do you want to be in here?
And he said, because I know I need. Emotional intelligence. I know my emotional intelligence is at a low. My wife will confirm that And he had an instance where he had an employee come in who was crying And he and he just walked away from her like he didn't really didn't this is baby cat He really didn't know how to handle it and he said I want to know how to handle a situation like that So we talked about it and he came up with techniques for how to handle that in the future It's not rocket science And I think people don't understand how easy it is to become some, so much more of an effective leader and business owners.
A lot of people get into business because they have a skill or a talent, but that doesn't mean they know how to run a business. So using my experience of starting running and selling and award winning, we won lots of awards that business for millions of dollars in the face of, you know, Being valued at zero.
I learned a few things along the way that I love to pass along, but I would say my biggest thing that I've had to learn is how to listen, ask questions and listen. When I first started coaching, I realized I was not a good listener. So going to Covey's the eighth. I, I created a talk called listening for better relationships, which I gave quite a few times.
So every time I gave it, I was reminding myself how to listen more. And I just asked one of the, my leadership trainees for a testimonial. And the most heartwarming thing in it that she said was that I asked her great questions that had her see the answers for herself. Because a lot of times, you know, the answer.
But you don't ask yourself the right question and then other times I bring my experience. So it's a combination of bringing my experience and helping you figure it out for yourself. So,
Laura Rotter
So true, Claire. I mean, a couple of things come up for me. My previous career was working at hedge funds on Wall Street and Which is really, historically, somebody is a good money manager.
So they raise more money and more money and at some point they need employees to help them. And by and large, they're terrible leaders. They have no idea how to lead. They just hire people and don't know how to give feedback and don't know how to interact. And I, I think the, biggest skill set is to know when that is a deficit and to reach out to someone like you and ask for help.
And another thing, when I started my financial planning practice, I would go to conferences where other people were taking, you know, sessions, portfolio management. I felt like that background I have, I want to learn how to listen better. I want to learn how to leave. A little bit of uncomfortable silence, which I can't say I'm 100 percent at, but to give someone to really develop an answer and then to ask reflective questionsand not to feel like my role is to constantly be fixing and advising because as you said, so much is just being a guide to help someone come up with the answers that are already inside them, but to give them space to explore and to think. And that's a skill that I continue to work on developing.
Claire Brown Kohler
Well, I think you're an excellent podcaster. You know, I listened to quite a few podcasters and I, the questions that you ask are insightful and lead to very in depth answers. So I would say that's a skill that you've taken and excelled at.
Laura Rotter
Oh, thank you very much. So to, to ask my last question, which is, you've had a long and varied professional career, which continues. How over this time, Claire, has your definition of success shifted?
Claire Brown Kohler
I think my definition of success is really, are you living your purpose?
Do you feel fulfilled? And I, I really think that that boils down to, we all have our own definitions of success. So for me, I'm successful because I really feel like I'm living into what I was called here to do, and I'm blessed that I've been given the opportunity and I, I seem to have a skill set that provides people with value that gives them positive outcomes.
So, you know, for my sister. My sister's success, one sister, it's, you know, she retired early and they sit around and they watch TV and they have a very easy, comfortable life and that's success to her. And I, I'm thrilled that she's happy. That's where she's living into what she wants. So I think you have to define success on your own, but for me, it's it, when you're living into your dream existence, that's success.
Laura Rotter
Wow, that is a powerful statement to say that you feel like you're living into your dream existence.
Claire Brown Kohler
I've changed some things. I mean, I'm not, but in many ways, you know, I wake up with a smile and I'm energized and I love the people that I get to hang out with. And, and I, I love my clients. And so, yeah, I'm living very much the life I want to live. I would make some tweaks, but you know, nothing's perfect.
Laura Rotter
is perfect when we're incarnated into these human bodies. So we get to navigate our moments of transcendence and our moments when crap happens. Exactly. Well, thank you so much for sharing your story with us, Claire. Really enjoyed our conversation.
Claire Brown Kohler
Oh, this has been amazing. Thank you so much.
I hope you enjoyed my conversation with Claire Brown Kohler of We Empower Leaders. Some of my takeaways. Number one, know the value of strategic relationships. One of Claire's core principles is intentional relationships. She shared that she was introduced to the man who would later become her business partner by an usher and a movie theater.
who recognized her after she saw the film Harold and Maude twice. This introduction led to a 33 year relationship that culminated in the successful sale of the company to a strategic partner. My second takeaway is to recognize the power of working with a team. Claire still has tremendous admiration for the team she worked with for 33 years, noting that it was devoid of politics, It was supportive and collaborative.
Quoting the Entrepreneurial Operating System, Claire shared that she, as the Chief Operating Officer, was the integrator, while the CEO is the visionary. In other words, everyone on a team has a unique role to play. in the organization. My third takeaway, anticipate the future. Claire's previous business evolved from a repertory cinema company to catalog and online sales, retail stores.
Film festivals and film distribution. The industry underwent a tremendous amount of technological change during this time. In her current coaching practice, Claire considers strategic planning to be a critical aspect of running a business and encourages her clients to stay current on shifts in their industry and to begin with the end in mind.
And finally.We bring about what we visualize.Claire worked with the law of attraction coach in 2013. And it attributes the successful sale of her former business in 2014 to her belief that abundance was possible, coupled, of course, with the hard work that she and the CEO put in to make the sale happen.
And Claire shared the story of how she helps others she works with achieve their visions. Are you enjoying this podcast?Please don't forget to subscribe so you won't miss next week's episode and a rating and a review is so Important to help other people just like you to find this plan and I'd greatly Appreciated if you're enjoying the show.
Thank you so much.
Narrator
Thanks for listening to making change with your money Certified financial planner, Laura Rotter specializes in helping people just like you, organized, clarify, and invest their money in order to support a life of purpose and meaning. Go to www. trueabundanceadvisors. com forward slash workbook for a free resource to help you on your journey.
Disclaimer, please remember that the information shared by this podcast does not constitute accounting, legal, tax, investment or financial advice. It's for information purposes only. You should seek appropriate professional advice for your specific information.