An interview with Monique de la Cour, owner of Monique de la Cour Health and Fitness. Monique helps women over 50 address balance issues so they can continue their active lifestyles.
Monique de la Cour has been a personal trainer and health coach for the past 19+ years. Monique helps improve the balance, strength and health of women over 50 who worry about osteoporosis and are afraid of falling. She helps her clients regain confidence and energy in a safe manner so that they may continue their active lifestyle.
In our discussion, Monique breaks down her process when working with clients for an assessment, particularly focusing on balance and strength. We learn about the importance to Monique of setting sub-goals and creating a program unique to each individual client that evolves as the client evolves.
Monique trained with the CHEK Institute as a Certified Holistic Exercise Specialist, giving her the tools to integrate modalities into her work that highlight the crucial role of core muscles in preventing injuries along the spine. She notes how balance is related to factors like menopause, chronic diseases, medication use, and vision changes.
Monique offers insight into the importance of prioritizing health and well-being as we age, and touches on the topic of body image and how it can shift with age, emphasizing the importance of being happy and healthy in one's own skin.
"That was really the place where I learned to take a holistic point of view of how people move and live, so you take into account not only the physicality, but also the emotions, the hormones, maybe even the spiritual side. All these processes have an effect on how you move through life." - Monique de la Cour
Key takeaways:
- Always be learning. Since graduating from school, Monique worked in disparate roles in various countries, from au pair and tour guide in Paris, to assistant manager for Heineken in the Netherlands, to working for Ernst and Young and Lalique in New York, and then a small private bank in New Jersey, before becoming a certified health and wellness coach and moving to New Orleans! The through line in all these roles is her love of learning - about new people, new products and new situations.
- If you’re experiencing pain in your body, recognize that the cause may not only be physical. When Monique works with a client, she always starts by doing an assessment. She of course takes into account what is taking place physically, in terms of pain or balance issues. Just as importantly, she explores what may be going on emotionally, what is going on hormonally, and what is taking place spiritually. As she points out, all these processes affect how we move through life.
- When helping others, listen for the need that lies beneath what they think they need! Monique noted that often people come to her because they would like to lose weight. However, looks are not what is going to extend their health span. The ability to have balance, to stand upright, is what is going to make a huge difference in their quality of life and their ability to remain free of injury and pain.
About the guest:
Growing up in the Netherlands, Monique de la Cour was an active child with endless energy. In fact, she loved physical fitness so much that she became a personal trainer and health coach.
For the past 19 years Monique has helped improve the balance, strength and health of women over 50, who worry about osteoporosis and are afraid of falling.
With patience and empathy, Monique helps clients regain confidence and energy in a safe manner so that they may continue their active lifestyles.
After overcoming her own health issues, Monique recently moved to New Orleans, where she indulges her love of live music and is searching for the best-tasting gumbo.
Website: moniquedelacourhealthandfitness.com
Email address: monique@moniquedelacourhealthandfitness.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/moniquedelacourhealthandfitness
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/moniquedelacourhealthandfitness/
Free resource: Balance Assessment
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Monique de la Cour
That was really the place where I learned to take a holistic point of view of how. People move and live, so you take into account, uh, not only the physicality, but also the emotions, the hormones, maybe even the spiritual side, all these processes have an effect on how you, you know, move through life.
Narrator
Welcome to making change with your money. A podcast that highlights the stories and strategies of women who experienced a big life transition and overcame challenges as they redefined financial success for themselves. Now here's your host, certified financial planner, Laura Rotter.
Laura Rotter
I'm so excited to have as my guest today, Monique de la Cour.
She is a personal trainer and a health coach for the past 19 years. Monique has helped improve the balance, strength, and health of women over 50, who worry about osteoporosis and are afraid of falling. Monique helps her clients regain confidence and energy in a safe manner so that they may continue their active lifestyle.
So welcome Monique to the making change with your money podcast.
Monique de la Cour
Thank you so much. I'm thrilled to be here, Laura. And I look forward to our conversation. Me too.
Laura Rotter
So I always start my conversations with the same question. I know, you know, you grew up in a different country, but what was like money like in your family growing up?
Monique de la Cour
Um, I would say it was tight. It's not that, um, we didn't have enough as children, but we were always very aware that we had to watch all the money going out. Now, I grew up in the Netherlands, and the Dutch have the same reputation as the Scottish, you know, that we're cheap, hence a lot of, uh, expressions here.
I didn't know that. Well, you know, Dutch treats, you know, those types of expressions,so that's where they come from. But I also realized that. You know, and I only recognize this at a later age, is that both my parents were little kids during the Holocaust. And so when they grew up, the country was in shambles and there was no money.
And eventually they were okay. But it did mean that they had to be extremely careful for a long time in their families of origin. So I understand why, you know, this came down to us as well. You know, obviously, you know, my generation, I was born in the early 60s. So it wasn't that long after the war ended.
And, uh, in Europe, it had an effect on every single family. So I think that's part of where that came from. Yes. So my parents, they were not college educated, but they worked very hard and we ended up having a nice middle class life again in the Netherlands. Everything is on a smaller scale, including finances, but we're, we were never deprived of anything.
You know, we had a, I would say a very nice childhood.
Laura Rotter
Thanks for sharing that. You've said we, so how many siblings do you have and where are you in the birth order, Monique?
Monique de la Cour
I'm the oldest of three. I have a brother, a middle child, so he, uh, he was a typical middle child, and then I have a younger sister.
And they and their families both still live in the Netherlands in the same town as where my mother lives. I'm the only one here in the United States. I've always been the wanderer. And that started at an early age. I think it had to do with the fact that I had to go to high school in a different city.
So every morning I would get on my bike and, um, it was about a half hour bike ride. So I didn't have the same connection that my siblings did with the town. And then after graduation, I didn't want to stay in the Netherlands, I wanted to learn different languages, so I lived in other countries. And then the big one, of course, eventually was to come here to the United States.
So I guess that has been a theme for me, always traveling. And it doesn't mean I'm unsettled, but I love to learn and see what's out in the world.
Laura Rotter
I love hearing how you're a learner. I too am a learner and traveling certainly is a way that helps you learn about other cultures and then by extension yourself.
What was it that you shared that you couldn't, you didn't go to school locally? It sounded like you couldn't. What, what was the variable that affected that?
Monique de la Cour
High school in the Netherlands is not the same as here. You test into a certain level and you go to that level school. And I believe it's still that way, actually.
And depending on the level that you're in, you either go to university, you go to the higher professional schools, mid level professional schools, or lower level professional schools. So everybody going to college is not a thing. If you go to university, you go straight into studying law, economics, medicine, whatever it is you're going to study.
If you want to be a teacher. You go to one of the higher professional level schools. If you want to be a bookkeeper, you go to a mid level professional school. So it's a different system. But it starts with the high schools and the level where I was at was outside of town. So that's Yeah, that's why I had to get on my bike.
Laura Rotter
Thank you. I didn't, I didn't realize it started in high school. I did know that, obviously, not only in the Netherlands, all over Europe, there isn't this concept of liberal arts college, and then you specialize. It's much more rigorous, if you will, and you either go on to higher or to technical schools. I didn't realize that started in high school, though, so thanks for sharing that with us.
And in the same way that you said, you know, Dutch resonates for you of, of, you know, a culture that's relatively, you know, scared, you know, has a scarcity mentality, if you will, around finance. I also think of Dutch culture as being on bicycles. So thanks for sharing.
Okay, well, the bicycle thing I think is more positive, paints a more positive picture of the country, because I really don't think that the Dutch are any cheaper than anybody else.
Laura Rotter
But it is true, the term going Dutch, I'm familiar with it.
Monique de la Cour
Yes, yes, indeed.
Laura Rotter
So explain to, you know, our listeners, the progression of. High school and college and your educational journey and how that led you to leave the country ultimately.
Monique de la Cour
Well, there was some zigzagging, so I did not know what I wanted to do at the end of high school and like I just said, you know, if you wanted to go and continue studying, you had to basically know what exactly you want to study, you know, there was no do over.
So, but what I did know is that I wanted to travel. So I moved first to Switzerland and I was there for six months, to be honest, enjoyed it for the first three months, but then I was really bored as beautiful as the country is, it was not a good place to be for a young person. at that time. So I didn't stay too long.
I came back to the Netherlands, still didn't know exactly what I was going to do. So I worked in tourism, which has been great in hindsight. You know, it really helped with my language skills because I was forced to speak several languages, and I'm still really grateful for that up to this day. And then I got it in my mind that I wanted to get much better at French and I moved to Paris for two years and I had a wonderful situation.
Laura Rotter
So you were in your early, I'm sorry to interrupt, you were in your early 20s when you moved?
Monique de la Cour
No, not, not yet because I, I skipped a grade in school. So I was actually 16 when I finished high school. Wow, that's young. Yeah, I was very young, hence the fact that I hadn't made up my mind yet. It took a long time.
So I moved to Paris, which was wonderful. I lived with a family in the center of Paris where I acted as their au pair from four o'clock in the afternoon on. During the day, I studied French. And then on the weekends, I would take French tourists all over Europe. I worked for a travel agency that worked with corporations mostly, which is a very common thing in France that, I guess, employee funds.
pay for trips of up to a week, sometimes two weeks. So initially I took people to the Netherlands, of course, every single weekend that got pretty old, even though I got to see my family, which was lovely. But then I started to travel all over Europe and here I was this little thing, you know, addressing all these groups in French and I had a blast.
It was wonderful. So I had a great time there for a few years, but then. It was time to become more serious again, and I went back to the Netherlands, the idea of settling down, and I ended up working for a number of years for a well known Dutch brewery, and that was a great job as well. Again, very international, I worked for duty free worldwide exports, so we exported.
alcoholic and non alcoholic drinks to military facilities, duty free facilities, ship chambers on the tiniest islands in the Pacific Ocean. So besides languages, that was also really good for my geography. So I still love trivia. I know so many port cities and oceans and rivers and that all came from that.
Laura Rotter
And Monique, what was your role within the…
Monique de la Cour
I was an assistant expert manager. So basically assisting the manager in the sales process and most of all putting lots and lots of beer into containers and calculating how many. Crates or pallets would go into each of these containers. Yes. Interesting.
Laura Rotter
So that was based back in Netherlands?
Monique de la Cour
Yeah. And I lived in the center of Amsterdam at the time. So it was a wonderful, it was just, you know, great for somebody in their early twenties at that point. But then one night I met the person who would become my future husband who was an American. And, um, He was just passing through, but we did become friends and eventually more than friends.
And then we had to decide whether he was about to start law school, whether he would study law in the U S or in the Netherlands and. You know, to be honest, there was no need for additional English speaking lawyers in the Netherlands simply because everybody speaks English anyway. So it just made sense for him to start school in the U S and that's where I joined him and that's how we ended up living in New York city.
Ah, where in New York City? Manhattan. I worked for initially the Dutch tax desk of Ernst Young, and to be honest, I found it very hard to work with numbers, I'm sorry, because I know you have an affinity for numbers, but for me, you know, it, it was not a good fit. And then I, uh, joined a French, you know, Lalique, the crystal manufacturer.
Who also carries high end silver and porcelain. So all super luxurious products where again, I was able to use my French and I loved working there. I did that for a few years until they decided to move to New Jersey. At that point, we were still living in New York city. So I did not stay with them for too long.
After that, the reverse commutes was terrible. And then I ended up going to a small private family bank. Where again, I worked for a number of years until I gave birth to my first child. So as you can see a lot of this continuity, and then I guess the other thing that I had discontinued in the Netherlands was my education, because when I worked at Heineken, I finally figured out that I wanted to study organizational marketing and I was well into it, but then I ended up moving to the United States or I didn't finish it.
And when I came here, I did pick it up again and I was fortunate to be able to do that at the new school, which is a very robust program at the time for people in, you know, different learning situations. So I did that after work, I would go there. I guess they didn't have that many people certainly. What are they called again?
Schools for professional continuation. Anyhow, so eventually I got my BA in psychology through the New School.
Laura Rotter
Interesting. So, I mean, a couple of questions are coming up for me. First of all, you've noted disparate roles you have, you had, Monique, but what's the through line that you see? Was it your language skills?
What exactly were the skills that You were emphasizing as you, you know, spoke to Lalique or other places you worked.
Monique de la Cour
I think my language skills helped me at the time. And then I would say people skills and curiosity. I love learning about new people, new products, new situations, even though it can be very unsettling too.
It's not always easy. Don't get me wrong. Coming to the U. S. was quite a cultural shock to say the least. But yeah, I would say that those are things that still play a huge role in my life. As you mentioned earlier, still love learning. And in a way that's how we met as well. We are in a group of women that love to learn and it never gets old.
Right. I'm going to be so sad the day that I don't want to learn anymore.
Laura Rotter
That will never happen.
Monique de la Cour
I don't think so either.
Laura Rotter
So, because you, you mentioned a role that. That again seemed to involve numbers.
Monique de la Cour
The private bank.
Laura Rotter
Yes, what were you doing at the private bank?
Monique de la Cour
I was assisting the investment managers. And it was interesting, but again, to me, it wasn't very satisfying that you help extremely wealthy people become even wealthier. So that's too limiting for me. You know, I, I'm just, I don't relate to people on that level. I love to hear people's stories. I don't want to know what their, you know, their bank accounts look like.
Laura Rotter
And also you, you mentioned ultimately your got your BA in psychology. How in your mind was that connected to organizational marketing?
Monique de la Cour
Well, even when I was studying marketing, I didn't do too well in the more numbers oriented side, but I was more than fine with, oh, what's that called? Behavioral marketing, behavioral economics.
I love that. I find that fascinating why people make choices, why people decide to buy things. One, actually an interesting situation for me was when I came to the U. S., I spoke English, you know, quite well, English, English. So when I would go to grocery stores, I would see these endless, you know, varieties of sage cereals.
And I would just stand there because in the Netherlands we would have maybe 10, 15 at the most and here, you know, you see far more than that. And I could, you know, read of course, and I understood what the boxes were saying, but I had such a hard time figuring out. Why I should pick this one over that because it was, you know, the taste was unfamiliar to me.
And I thought, you know, this is such a pure marketing thing. I'm basically just looking at the colors and the type setting and whatever appeals to me becausethey're all the same, right? It's just cereal. But yeah, I mean, it doesn't sound that I was coming from a country of scarcity. It's just, you know, cereal as an example, because it's not something that is commonly eaten in the Netherlands.
Laura Rotter
Oh, it's not? So what do people have for breakfast?
Monique de la Cour
Usually a slice of bread with either cheese, or we love all kinds of chocolate sprinkles. If you've ever visited the Netherlands, you've probably seen that in a hotel, put some butter on your slice of bread, chocolate sprinkles on it, and you know, that's how kids often start their day.
It's good. And then the cheeses, of course, are unparalleled.
Yeah.
Laura Rotter
So then you, I'm really curious to hear the journey from how you just left us, which is, okay, you decided to stay home with, you had one child, so you became a full time mom. And you were
in your thirties?
Monique de la Cour
Yes, I was the full time mom at that point.
I was approaching my mid thirties. Yeah. When my second child came around, I was in my mid thirties. And so, yeah, I was a mom in suburban New Jersey and I had the privilege of being able to stay home with my kids. We did not have a nanny. Eventually, I found a person who would look after the kids one afternoon a week, but on the other hand, because I don't have any family here, I really didn't have that much support.
So that was rough. I would say that I found a lot of solace in a play group that I belong to, because, you know, not having family around that can help you out every once in a while was not easy. But I settled in a lovely area of New Jersey and I lived there for, I think, 25 years or so. And when my youngest was getting ready to go to preschool, I decided that I wanted to go back to work and combine that with the passion of mine, which was Health and fitness.
I have always been a very active child. My family was very active. Both my parents were amazing swimmers. My father was a fantastic water polo player who would play on the national team every once in a while. He eventually went on to manage swimming pools. So I was always swimming and doing sports and it's just in my blood.
So being able to do that, not swimming, but you know, having movements as a profession was just, um, you know, very satisfying to me. And then plus I knew that I could teach it to others. So this was the way to go. In addition, I was able to set my own hours, which was perfect with young kids at home. So I started part time first for a Jewish community organization and then eventually privately as well.
And I've done that for almost 20 years now. I've slowly built on it. I've become more specialized. Because when you first start out, you have no idea what you're doing. And it's so scary because you worry that you may hurt a person. But thenonce you you know, keep studying and studying and get to know people better.
It's become so satisfying to help people lead a pain free lifestyle. So just to Go back to how I, when you start out in that profession, you basically get a diploma, which is like a base level. And from there on…
Laura Rotter
like what kind of training, what organization?
Monique de la Cour
I did it through the American council and exercise, and then you can call yourself a personal trainer.
And then very quickly, I realized that everybody was so complicated, in particular, postural issues. And I realized I had to know a lot more about the spine and posture as such. So then I went to the CHEC Institute, which stands for Certified Holistic Exercise Specialist. And there is really That was really the place where I learned to take a holistic point of view of how people move and live.
So you take into account not only the physicality, but also the emotions, the hormones, maybe even the spiritual side. All these processes have an effect on how you, you know, move through life. And I'm so glad that I did that. Because it really helped me understand individual bodies, no two people are the same.
It has given me the assessment skills, which I really pride myself that I'm able totalk with people, look at the way they move, have them answer questionnaires to really figure out what the underlying issues are of your pain. If you have shoulder pain, it doesn't come out of nowhere, right? I mean, unless it's been.
fall or trash, there's probably something else going on. And even that fall may have been injured, or may have caused by bad posture or weakness in the legs. And so I, I love to dig deeper and really see what's going on underneath. I would never just tell you, Oh, Laura, you should do this or that without doing a thorough assessment.
Laura Rotter
You know, I myself did a yoga teacher training. It's now quite a while ago. And I remember through some of the work we did there, discovering not surprisingly that, you know, I have one side of my body that's much weaker than the other. But if you're not In a position to be thinking about these things, it's, you know, now it's like, of course, all each side of our body is different.
And then we've learned over time to compensate. If you hurt an ankle, you're end up compensating and and other parts of your body are taking over and may become compromised. But And I think for most of us who are not in any way involved in thinking about movement, after I did that teacher training, I, I found myself just watching how people walk, how people stand.
Monique de la Cour
Yes.
Laura Rotter
It, it, you know, whether people lock out their knees or it's just, it's fascinating to watch how people use their bodies, let alone how, you know, how I use my body. So Monique, I'm curious. Do you do assessments over zoom or how do you work?
Monique de la Cour
I do. So when I first started working with somebody, we first have a conversation and just a general conversation about, you know…
Laura Rotter
Let's take, I'm sorry to interrupt, um, step back.So when you say working with someone is there, I did introduce you with someone who works with women, 50 years old. Plus, is that by and large the population you work with, or is it more diverse?
Monique de la Cour
Yes. Well, I certainly work with men as well, but I very quickly realized that, you know, if you're looking to improve your running times, I'm not the person for you.
I like to look at, you know, specific issues or problems even, or people who truly have serious health issues. I like working with them. But if you, you know, want to do triathlons, then I'm probably not your person, no.
Laura Rotter
Thank you for helping nail that down. So now I've contacted you for an assessment. How do you work?
Monique de la Cour
So first we'll have a conversation and then hopefully you can tell me why you reached out to me. Do you have specific concerns? Why do you feel that, for instance, your balance is not good? What has been going on? In which situations do you notice that it's not optimal? We talk a little bit about your lifestyle, what you would like to do in the future.
And then we make an appointment for an assessment. The assessment takes about an hour and a half, not necessarily, you know, but I do assess your balance, strength. And I take you through a series of stretches for the entire body and then I'm watching you on screen and you have to tell me, you know, which side is tight, which one is not.
And then I have a whole bunch of information. Oh, and then I will also ask you to have one of your family members make a short video of you walking so that I know what your gig looks like. And then I look at all that stuff together and I start working on a program. We talk a little bit more about maybe sub goals, not just the main goal, but also things underneath.
And then, you know, start working together via Zoom. Every single time I see you on screen, it's basically a way for me to assess you as well. because I can report and say, Oh, you know, your squats are getting better or that stretch seems to go a little bit further. And so I can keep progressing you safely.
Now it's very well possible. That's say your upper body is not progressing very quickly, but your lower body is. So then we just adjust the program. You know, we keep progressing the lower body. But maybe with the upper body, there's some tweaks that need to be made, or we notice that there is maybe a weakness in one of the rotator cuff muscles based on the movements that you do in one way or another, then we'll adjust that again.
So it's always. Looking at an individual and specifically adapting to your needs. And, you know, sometimes you walk in and you may say, Oh, today my left shoulder hurts. So then we switch up the program.We'll do something else. Other days you may walk in, Oh, I'm so stressed. I just can't work out today. And then we'll do something that's called working in.
So maybe more yoga oriented or breathing exercises or movements that come from the Alexander technique or some role thing. And maybe that's all you can do on that day, because if you're stressed, you should not exercise and certainly not exercise hard because exercise in and of itself is a stress as well.
It's a good stress, but you know, one day or another, it may not be what you need. So, you know, also for the client, it's very important to become more and more aware of what's going on with their own bodies. Me, you as a yoga teacher probably know this, but there are a lot of people where the body and the mind are almost disconnected.
I have some people whom I've worked with for a long, long time, and every time, it's like the first time. And, um,it's just very difficult for them to sense what's going on. It's just not the way their mind works. It's very, it's very hard. So, eventually they come there. But it takes a long time.
Laura Rotter
I'd have to agree with you that culturally and speaking for myself, I mean, we tend to live in our minds and I feel like I'm sure yoga was a contributor because I'm both a yoga and a meditation practitioner.
And I'm so aware when I'm up here and can then say, you know, Brief moments at a time. What does the air feel like on your body? What is the seat underneath you feel like? What is the, just bringing it down into the body and not, and not staying in the story and the whirlwind that is always I'm pointing to my head go going on up here.
I'm curious, Monique, because you mentioned the Alexander technique. I have I have, I have a bad back and I've really benefited from working with a Feldenkrais practitioner. So what role, if anything, do those kind of modalities, which is just very aware again of how we hold our bodies, how do you integrate those modalities into, into your work?
Monique de la Cour
Those modalities are part of the Czech curriculum that I did. I am not a Feldenkrais or Alexander Technique instructor, but I guess these techniques were borrowed with permission. And what helps tremendously are the mobilizations that you can do through these techniques. They're often quite small, but help to loosen up.
The spine, for instance, and sometimes that's all a person needs or all that they can do, especially if they're in sciatic pain, shoulder pain, you just want them to mobilize the spine and then hopefully. Once the spine is mobilized, posture has hopefully slightly improved, and then you can start adding some strength exercises.
In some instances, it may take quite a while before you start adding weights, even body weight. It may not, you know, happen with everybody right away, just because the spine is not moving properly. I mean, you know, look at it, for instance, somebody with very rounded shoulders who sits at a computer all day, which is, you know, many of us, of course, you cannot start exercising like that because what you do is you start strengthening yourself in that less than optimal posture.
So even if you don't go to, you know, specific Alexander technique or golfing type of movements, you should at least stretch, you know, get those shoulders back before you start working with resistance because you're just going to exacerbate the problem that's already there. And, uh, that's of course something that we want to avoid at all costs.
You cannot strengthen yourself in a suboptimal posture, I don't know if you've ever heard the term. You can't shoot a cannon from a canoe. And, um, yeah. Well, but if you consider, you know, the torso, or you can even say the core muscles, if they're weak. Then there is no base, right? You can lift all the weight you want with your arms or legs.
The injuries are going to happen along the spine. So you have to, you have to start along the spine first. That's where all movement starts. Starts in the brain, then, you know, makes its way down to the extremities. So, you have to make sure that that pathway is in as good a condition as possible.
Laura Rotter
So, it sounds like you do, everything you do is quite tailored to the individual.
And again, as I introduced you, Monique, I emphasized balance, though you did mention pain a lot. So, I guess my questions are twofold. How are balance and pain interrelated? And why do people primarily come to you?
Monique de la Cour
Well,it was a slow progression in a way. I noticed that more and more people were starting to come to me after a fall.
Or, you know, they were starting to worry about falling and nothing had happened yet, but it was just in the back of their heads. And then, you know, I realized that something was going on there and that we had to look deeper than just help them regain strength after the fall or just strengthening them overall.
So, and then the other thing with regards to pain is if you have pain in the body, you move differently, which makes you more likely to fall.
Laura Rotter
I mean, it is one of the things I learned from Feldenkrais that, yeah, I, I was just. exacerbating the pain by, you know, using my body differently to avoid it unconsciously, so.
Monique de la Cour
Yeah, I mean, to the extreme, you know, imagine that you're so afraid of falling, as if you're walking on ice, you know, you start to take smaller steps. You know, of course, you're more likely to fall then.
Laura Rotter
Really? Is that true? I have to remember that next time I walk on ice.
Monique de la Cour
Well, you know, um, I hope you won't be, but you know, when people take very small steps, not so much on ice.
That's probably, I didn't describe that very well, but if you see someone walking with small steps, it's very well possible that their upper body moves faster than the lower body. And then, you know,
Laura Rotter
Thank you for clarifying that.
Monique de la Cour
Yes. But, and what I also noticed over time in particular working with women is that with the onset of menopause and perimenopause really a lot of, I wouldn't say problems, but issues come up.
that may affect your balance in the long run. So I'm not saying that menopause causes balance issues, but, um, those years are years in which we really should take some preemptive measures to make sure that we don't become a fall risk. And then, you know, what I'm talking about is the onset of chronic disease, chronic diseases, that's again during perimenopause.
And then, With that becomes the use of medications and especially if we use three or more medications, the interaction is likely to affect our balance because especially if one of them is either a sleep aid or Uh, an anti anxiety, anti depressive, or heart medication. They may cause drowsiness, feelings of, uh, instability.
And it's not just prescription medications, it can happen with supplements as well. So if you take three or more medications and or supplements, definitely discuss it with your doctor. Because. It could increase your risk of falling or vision changes. We all know that, uh, so stay on top of, you know, your prescription definitely go every year.
And if anything is out of the ordinary, go see your eye doctor because. depth perception is so very important. And then, of course, you know, during the pandemic, we wore masks, which also impeded our vision, or at least our depth perception. So yeah, vision is very, very important. Vestibular diseases, you know, some people Are really helped by the epinephrine when they, um, start getting vertigo.
That's not something I do. You need to see a specialist for that. But definitely stay on top of it. Don't let it get away from you. Oh, and postural deterioration. We spoke about that already. So especially once we're in our 50s. A lifetime of activities start to take its toll. So for instance, if you've always sat at your desk in front of a computer, now, you know, those changes in the neck, in the thoracic spine may become permanent.
You may have a lot less leg strength because you're not moving as much as you used to. You, you, you sit a lot for your profession or, you know, At night, when we're so tired, we just plop on the couch, so our leg strength really diminishes.Then, of course, the, uh, the core muscles tend to go to mush. I know a lot of, uh, a lot of us complain about the, uh, menopausal belly, and there is, of course, a lot we can do.
We cannot make it go away completely. But, you know, if we strengthen ourselves, eat as cleanly as we can, there's a lot we can do. But, you know, it is unfortunately a fact that's under the influence of hormones. Fat tends to migrate to our waist, you know, you see very few mature women with large thighs, but you see plenty of them with a more ample waist, and that is the lack of estrogen.
That, I would say that is the number one complaint of women who come to see me, besides, I mean about their, their physicality, and then the other one are You know, upper arms. So I often think, Oh, but there's so many other bigger issues that you should think about, but no, it's the belly and the arms. Cause you know, that's what people see when they look in the mirror.
Laura Rotter
So am I, I first, I was about to ask, am I correct in understanding that people come to you for balance issues, but it sounds like they also come toextensively lose weight or lose inches.
Monique de la Cour
Yes. That's often a reason they come to me. But they're usually bigger issues that have to be dealt with first, although those who specifically come for balance are generally very realistic about what they need and their looks are secondary.
So that's, I think is, is wonderful because the looks are not what's going to extend our health span, whereas being able to remain upright, you know, that's going to make a huge difference in the quality of life and remain free of injury and pain. Yes.
Laura Rotter
I certainly, in my own life, recognize. That just staying healthy, eating well and exercising adequately has become the most important thing to me.
And, you know, what I look, what my body looks like. I mean, that's part of, you know, letting go of attachment. I was always someone who was always in good shape. I am still in good shape and I recognize that at the age of 64, my body is not going to look like what it did at. 24, 34, not even 54, you know, it, it changes the shape changes and, you know, having watched several people I love get sick and unable to eat and becoming, you know, so thin.
the intellectual part of me, which luckily I'm in touch with more and more rather than the emotional part is, thank God when I eat, I gain weight. Like the metabolism works and I have an appetite and celebrating that rather than. Being frustrated a little bit.
Monique de la Cour
Do you know the French saying, Elle est peau.
She's good in her skin. And it sounds like you're very representative of that. That you are happy in your own skin. You focus on your health. And you know what good health is supposed to feel
like.
Laura Rotter
Yes. And of course, there's a, again, in our culture as women, we are given an ideal and, you know, we don't want to get older, you know, so many friends were getting injections and potions, you know, a couple of times a year and, you know, you can't fight it at the end of the day or you can, but, uh, you know, it doesn't really, it's going to get you.
No matter what. I'm curious how many, do you have a number of people that come specifically for pain?
Monique de la Cour
No, it's usually secondary, but it's usually being caused by something else. They know what the diagnosis is. I then often work with their doctor or their physical therapist and follow up on the program that has been prescribed to them by a physical therapist and then start integrating that into our body.
type movements. I see a lot of people who have just been released from physical therapy, but the physical therapist will focus on one specific area of your body. And then, say, for instance, you have something in your right shoulder, well, now I'm going to focus on incorporating the heeled shoulder into day to day functional movements, whatever those functional movements are for you.
You know, so if you like to play pickleball, you know, we do things that are specific. To that sport, if you like to play with your grandkids on the floor, you do something else. Grandkids, by the way, are a major source of pain, Julie.
Laura Rotter
I'm not surprised.
Monique de la Cour
Yes, yeah, they wiggle and, you know, they All of a sudden they can give you a shooting pain down your back.
Laura Rotter
And especially if, you know, how many people have I seen who are in terrible shape, but they're going to sort of make their way to the floor to play with their grandchildren and pick them up, even though they're now five years old and weigh quite a lot. And I could see that it would be a major cause.
Monique de la Cour
Yeah. Yeah. And that's the other thing, of course, when I start working with somebody, it's really figuring out what it is they want. So for some, it is indeed being able to play on the floor with their grandkids. Others, you know, may want to start traveling more now that they're possibly close to retirement.
Again, others want to play a pickleball. So those are very different movements and you need to know specifically what is required for each of these activities and that's what you focus on. So that's, I guess, just a functional exercise. Your body has to function to support your lifestyle, whatever your lifestyle is.
There's no right or wrong. Just do what you can, and the beauty of all of it is that you can start very small, and these small changes have a huge effect, and I love that, it gives confidence to people, and all of a sudden it's like, hey, it's not so hard to pick up my blanket, or it's not so hard to get up from the floor without hands, I love that, when I see that growth in people.
Laura Rotter
I love how you said that, Monique. You, we've, we've explored how you, you love people and you have curiosity and it seems like you found a role as a provider that in some ways even feels like a mission to you and satisfies your need for. Relationship and always learning and connection. So, um, I'm going to ask you as we get towards the end of our conversation.
How has you've had so many changes of your life in terms of geography and profession? So, um, Over this time, how has your definition of success and perhaps even financial success shifted?
Monique de la Cour
Well, I would say that, um, first of all, having good health to me is the most important thing. During the past two years, I had to deal with two diagnoses of stage zero breast cancer.
First time I was treated, it was there, and then I was diagnosed a second time in less than a year after many, many different, uh, pathologists looking at, um, my tissues. And an eighth month long process of not knowing what it actually was, I was finally told very recently, just a few months ago, that what I currently have is not cancerous, but changes caused by radiation.
And I think after that news, I've just learned to appreciate my health so much. You can probably imagine that as a personal trainer and a health coach, I was very, very surprised when I heard this for the first time. I don't have any family. I'm sorry. I don't have any family history. of breast cancer. So this came out of nowhere and for a short while I was beating myself up.
So how could this happen to me? Did I not eat right or did I not work out enough? But then I realized it can happen to anyone. But the second time was a huge blow. I have to admit that that was, that was incomprehensible to me. And then the fact that they took eight monthsand seven different pathologists to determine what was going on.
It was a very difficult process. But, um, so my health is something that I cherish very much. And then I would say being able to be in charge of my time. And being able to do with my money what I want to do has been, I guess, a wealth of freedom.
Laura Rotter
Well, time freedom, I guess. I often say that we have three scarce resources.
Money, of course, but also time and also energy. So it sounds like you feel like You are now abundant in time resources. Is that correct?
Monique de la Cour
Yes, I am. I also recently moved to a new city and. made it my mission to meet as many people as possible within a short period of time. I've done that and I've already made a few good friends.
Yes. And I realized how precious relationships are. And the fact that I can choose when to spend time with people in my life that I love and care for in a place where I had dreamt of living, I guess makes me feel like a very wealthy human.
Laura Rotter
And can you share where you're living now as I see you in your, in your short sleeves and I'm in a sweater.
Monique de la Cour
Oh, I'm living in New Orleans since earlier this year. And I have found that people who live here are incredibly hospitable, welcoming, always willing to try new things. And I must say, I've also been looking for it a lot more than I did when I lived in New Jersey, where most of my friends were those I met when my kids were young or in school, you know, you meet them on the soccer fields or the PTA.
And now I'm much more intentional about going out and meeting people through meetups or differents. Nationwide and local organizations that are part of, and it's been a wonderful experience. I would recommend it to everyone, I guess, friends and putting yourself out there and taking that first step. But it's so easy as it turns out, everybody wants to be approached because everybody is scared of being rejected.
And if you even just say, Oh, I love those yellow boots or whatever, you know,people immediately brighten up and. I just love it. That's how you start conversations and, um, it's, uh, everybody wants to be seen and heard.
Laura Rotter
So true. And it takes us getting older to recognize that and to, you know, not be stuck in ourselves.
And as you said, our fear of rejection, but look around the room if you walk into a new space and who seems to be standing alone and who could you welcome into the space. And I definitely share that since the pandemic, I too have become much more social and met many more women like yourself, Monique, and it's.
As an introvert, I'm really enjoying it. It's quite a pleasure to get out of my own skin and, and put myself out there to help other people feel at ease. I know that you do have for our listeners a, a balance assessment that I will share in the show notes. And is there anything else you'd like to share before we end our conversation?
Monique de la Cour
No, I mean, I would love it if you would take the balance assessment. It's basically a video where I'll talk you through it. And if you have any questions whatsoever about what you're feeling while doing it, or maybe you do feel unsteady, I'd be happy to, uh, speak with you. Just reach out. No charge, of course, but I'd love to help you.
Laura Rotter
Thank you so much. This has been such a nice way to get to know each other, Monique. I enjoyed our conversation.
I hope you enjoyed my conversation with Monique DeLacoeur, owner of Monique DeLacoeur Health and Fitness. Some of my takeaways that I'm happy to share, always be learning. Since graduating from school, Monique worked in disparate roles in various countries from au pair and tour guide in Paris to assistant manager for Heineken in the Netherlands.
To working for Ernst Young and then Lalique in New York and then a small private bank in New Jersey before becoming a certified health and wellness coach and recently moving to New Orleans. The through line in all these roles is her love of learning about new people, new products, and new situations.
My second takeaway, if you're experiencing pain in your body, recognize that the cause may not only be physical. When Monique works with a client, she always starts by doing an assessment. She, of course, takes into account what is taking place physically in terms of pain or balance issues.
But just as importantly, she explores what may be going on emotionally, what's going on hormonally, and what's taking place spiritually.
As she points out, all these processes affect how we move through life. My third takeaway,when helping others, listen for the need. that lies beneath what they think they need. Monique noted that often people come to her because they would like to lose weight. However, looks are not what is going to extend their health span.
The ability to have balance to stand upright is what is going to make a huge difference in their quality of life and their ability to remain free of injury and pain.Are you enjoying this podcast?Please don't forget to subscribe. So you won't miss next week's episode. And if you're enjoying the show, a rating and a review would be greatly appreciated and will help other women just like you to find the show.
Thank you so much.
Narrator
Thanks for listening to Making Change With Your Money. Certified Financial Planner, Laura Rotter specializes in helping people just like you, organized, clarify, and invest their money in order to support a life of purpose and meaning. Go to www. trueabundanceadvisors. com forward slash workbook for a free resource to help you on your journey.
Disclaimer, please remember that the information shared by this podcast does not constitute accounting, legal, tax, investment, or financial advice. It's for information purposes only. You should seek appropriate professional advice for your specific information.